Allergies can be a touchy subject. Most of us know they’re nothing to mess with, and anaphylaxis is certainly no laughing matter. So sure, it makes sense to be empathetic, cautious, and considerate when it comes to something that could quite literally put someone’s life in danger. But sometimes a situation is less clear, raising all sorts of questions. For instance, how far should someone go to accommodate another person’s allergy? What about a coworker’s allergy and what you eat before you’ve even arrived at the office? Or what if you find out that a partner’s allergy—one you’ve been vigilantly avoiding—has less to do with actual medical repercussions and more to do with a food preference?

Those are the kinds of conundrums the people in today’s list found themselves chewing on, turning to the AITA community for some insight into who exactly was being unreasonable—or perhaps simply uncompromising—in these situations. Read on and share your verdict in the comments!

#1 Aita For Arguing With Someone When He Said I Was Lactose Intolerant And Didn't Have A Dairy Allergy

So I have a dairy allergy, I've had it my entire life. When I eat dairy my mouth and throat get itchy and sometimes my nose gets runny. I guess when I was a baby my parents gave me cheese and I kept itching my eyes, they took me to the pediatrician and he determined I had a dairy allergy.

I was hanging out with some friends yesterday like 4 people and my friend brought his friend "Allen" with. My friend said something about getting pizza and I said "you guys can and I'll get a burger or something somewhere because I can't eat pizza " (people forget no big deal).

Allen was like "why can't you eat pizza? Lactose intolerant?" I said "no that I have a dairy allergy". He was like "it's the same thing just take a lactade and you'll be fine". I said "no it's not, my reactions are different this is an allergy not an intolerance ". He was like "dude there's no such thing as a dairy allergy it's lactose intolerance". I said "well if I eat dairy my throat gets itchy and if someone has lactose intolerance it upsets their stomach" he was like "it's lactose intolerance dairy allergies aren't a thing". I told him if he wanted someone to explain it to him I'd give him my doctor's number but I'm done discussing it, I had zero intention of doing that but I was sick of going in circles.

After allen left my friend that brought him said that I should have just agreed with Allen instead if arguing with him because he's "argumentative and always has to prove he's right" that I antagonized him by feeding into it?

AITA should I have just said sure and let it go

#2 Aita For “Overreacting” About My Allergies?

I (17f) have an extremely severe peanut allergy, its put me in the hospital three times and ive almost passed away because of it once. I have two other food allergies but theyre not nearly as severe as my peanut allergy.

A couple nights ago, I went over to my boyfriends (19m) house. I ate dinner beforehand because I never eat at peoples house out of concern. His parents completely understand this, but sometimes he gets upset with me because of it. I cant eat out at restaurants like he wants to, which he constantly brings up. He also hates that he has to give up certain foods when hes around me. He constantly brings these points up when we argue, even if its completely unrelated. It makes me sad but I understand where hes coming from.

Anyways, the other night when I went over to my boyfriends house, he decided he was still hungry after dinner. He said to wait in his room and that he would be right back after he ate. He came back to the room and looking back he was acting kind of weird but I honestly didnt question it at the time. He then got really close to me like he wanted to kiss and I instantly could smell his breath. It was distinctly peanut butter. I asked him what the herll he was doing and he then started screaming at me that it was a joke and he wasnt actually going to do anything. As we were arguing, I felt like I was struggling to breathe. It felt like I was having a reaction even through he didnt even touch me. I ran downstairs where my bag was to grab my epipen just in case. I left right after without saying anything.

After getting home I texted him that I didnt want to see him again. He then started spamming me about how I was overreacting and that I was a burden anyways. He said I didnt deserve him and that I wont ever find someone to put up with my problems. What broke me is when he said that he did it on purpose because he didnt believe that I had any allergies in the first place and that he thought I was lying because hes never seen me have a reaction. But now I feel kind of bad about it, and it makes me feel like hes right about me being a burden/overreacting and the other stuff he said. AITA?

#3 Aita For Being Pissed That My Dil Won’t Accommodate My Allergy So I Am Not Going To Her Dinner

I am very very frustrated. My son has been married to my DIL for three years now. I have always made extra dishes that didn’t include meat to accommodate her. No matter how much it was a pain to do I always made sure she had options to eat when I hosted or she was over. She is vegetarian and at one point tried to go vegan.

My son and her never hosted due to living in a small apartment but that changed since they have just bought a home. They are having a dinner this week and I called her to remind her I am allergic to nuts. She then informed me that she doesn’t doenst have time and to bring my own food. She told me that she cooks a lot with different nuts and she can’t make adjustments to her menu.

This is where I am at be a jerk, I told her I will not be going and neither will my husband. That I have accommodated her for years and not once have I made her bring her own food. This started an argument where she thinks I am being unreasonable.

My husband is on my side but my son and her as very upset.

Edit: stop downvoting people who say there are allergies that are not life threatening, they are correct. My allergy is not life threatening, if it was going to end me I wouldn’t be okay with any of the dishes having nuts, I just asked for one that I can eat. I can be at a table with nuts it’s fine.

This actually personally annoys me, allergic reactions are a spectrum from very mild to end you.

Also for everyone saying allergies get worse every time people have it are incorrect, some allergies can be improved through exposure therapy which is usually done at a doctors. My daughter has literally done that with her shellfish allergy.

According to the Asthma and Allergy Foundation of America (AAFA), “Allergies are among the most common, but overlooked, diseases in the United States,” affecting more than 106 million people each year. That works out to roughly one in three people in the country. Common allergic conditions include seasonal allergies, eczema, and food allergies.

#4 Aita For Refusing To Go To A Friend's 21st Birthday Due To Allergies?

I (21f) was invited to my friend Stacy's (fake name) birthday celebration a few days ago. She has been very excited, as she is the last in our friend group to turn 21, and has been keeping her party planning mostly secret so she can suprise us all. Turns out she organised for a few of our friends, as well as some other friends from her college cheer team, to have a picnic at our city's botanical gardens (I'm unsure if these are global, but it's basically a large park with lots of different plants). She picked out a spot right next to the rose display, as they are her favourite flowers and hold a lot of sentimentality for her.

The issue is, I am quite allergic to flowers, think hayfever but worse. I'm not anaphylactic, but my eyes become so itchy they can swell closed, my nose runs like a leaky tap, and very rarely, I can struggle to breathe. The flower I seem to be most allergic to are roses, as the breathing issue tends to happen when I am exposed to them. Stacy does know about my allergies, and has seen me have a few reactions over the years.

I declined the invitation, and naturally, as 21st are usually an important celebration, she texted me asking why I couldn't come. When I told her, she became quite upset with me and said that my excuse wasn't good enough, and that there must be a better reason, and when I said it was my real reason, she became even more upset. She kept insisting that I come anyways, citing that I have medication to help me, but she must have forgotten it was a nasal spray, as when I reminded her she said that it was disgusting, and she didn't want to see that on her birthday, even though I offered to run to the toilets when I needed to use it.

I tried to comprimise with her, and said that I'd be happy to wear a mask, as it may help lessen the severity, but she shot the idea down as it was a picnic, so i'd take it off to eat, and she didn't want a mask to be in photos. I also said that I'd be happy to take her out for breakfast earlier in the day so we could still hang out for her birthday, but she declined as she wanted all of her friends to celebrate together. I don't want to miss her birthday, but I don't want to ruin it my being a sniffly mess, and possibly having a severe reaction. AITA?

#5 Aita For Not Accommodating My Brothers Wife's Food Allergies?

I know the title sounds bad but please read before judging.

My fathers birthday was Thursday. Usually he makes dinner at family meals because he's easily the best cook but because it was his birthday I offered to make something. He told me what he would like for dinner and I got all the ingredients and planned it. It was supposed to be just my parents, my brother, and I, so we made sure it was something that everyone could eat.

Well, Thursday I go to their house in the morning and at around 3 start getting everything ready. I'd been doing stuff in the kitchen for about an hour when my brother called and asked if everyone's okay with his wife coming. We say sure, and then he asks what I'm making. I tell him, and he asks if I can make something else because his wife is allergic to the main ingredient. So there's no way I can still make the dish but without that ingredient.

I told him I couldn't change it now because I had already started, but that there would be sides that she could eat and she was welcome to bring her own food. He got upset at this and said that I could just put something similar in or something and that it was really important that she's not around this food because her allergy is severe. Me and my father explained that we couldn't make anything else and that it could have been worked around with more notice but it's too late. My brother got upset and said that we should care more about his family.

He came but his wife did not and he was making rude comments about the meal and passive aggressively saying how it would be nice if his wife was here. Dinner ended and he basically left right after. Afterwards he was texting me saying I should have accommodated his wife's serious allergy and now I'm thinking I may be in the wrong.

AITA for not changing the dish I was making for her allergies?

#6 Aita For Leaving Class Early After Being Exposed To My Allergen

Today was my first day of the semester and my professor gave everyone Mazapan which is a mexican peanut candy. I have a severe allergy to peanuts and everyone was eating it in class and crumbs were getting everywhere and the smell of peanuts was STRONG.

After the class ate the candy, we did a group activity where we had to put post it notes on the wall & write someone we look up to but everyone was touching all the markers and my contamination OCD kicked in.

I felt uncomfortable and trapped so I asked to leave about 15 min early after explaining my allergy and my professor seemed offended and annoyed by that. I understand some people are uneducated about food allergies and how serious they are so I get why he was a bit confused. Was I just letting my health anxiety get to me or was that justified??

(EDIT: i am a third year college student and i am aware i do not have to ask permission to leave but i always do during the first week since it is all important information about the class and i dont want to miss anything)

But despite how common allergies are—and despite what your mother-in-law or Aunt Susan might think—they aren’t merely an inconvenience. For people with severe allergies, exposure to a trigger can result in anaphylaxis, a potentially life-threatening allergic reaction that requires immediate medical attention. The AAFA estimates that anaphylaxis accounts for between 45,000 and 50,000 emergency room visits in the U.S. each year. Even more unsettling, according to the organization, emergency room visits for anaphylaxis more than doubled between 2008 and 2016.

#7 Aita For Getting My Co-Worker An Allergic Attack And Getting Her Sent To The Hospital?

So I (22M) and my co-worker Lukas (23M) decided to surprise our co-worker Lily (25F) for her first year anniversary. With permission from our boss we decided to fill up her entire office with balloons, normally we start working at 9AM but for this we came in 3 hours early at 6AM.

Together we spent around 50$ worth of equipment to do this, we finished this within 2 hours and started waiting until Lily came to the office. After 45 minutes she arrived and she went up to her office, once she got to her office she opened the door and the entire room was filled with balloons. But since there were so many, alot of them escaped the room and fell onto Lily.

She suddenly started screaming and backed off really quickly, we went out of hiding and surprised her. Then she said she was very allergic for latex, but I didn't understand. She explained that balloons are made of Latex, and that I should've known that she was allergic for Latex.

After 30 minutes the allergic reaction became so severe that she had to be rushed to the hospital, I didn't mean to do this since I thought balloons were made out of rubber. It's been 2 days and she's recovering at home since returning from the hospital today.

So Reddit, AITA?

#8 Aita For Getting Mad At My Fiancée For Lying About Her Allergy?

Throughout our time together, my SO told me that she was allergic to peanuts. I made sure that all of our dishes didn’t contain peanuts, and that I would only eat them outside of the house.

Yesterday, her lie got found out. My parents gave me some Indian food, they’re Indians, I was going to label that the Biryani had peanuts, but I guess I had a brain fart. She began to eat it. I knew something was wrong when I saw her eating it, when I suddenly realized what happened.

I literally tossed her spoon from her hand. I told her that the Biryani has peanuts in it. She just goes “Oh, I’m not allergic to peanuts; I just hate the taste of it”. I was really mad; she was lying about such an important thing. I’ve been unnecessarily taking extra precautions so she doesn’t even breathe in peanut particles. She’s calling me a jerk for being mad at her.

She lied throughout our entire relationship. I don’t know what other things she has lied about. Is her name really Rebecca? Is she really a woman?

But seriously, AITA?

#9 Aita For Eating Something My Coworker Is Allergic To?

There’s a woman in my office who is anaphylactic to eggs. We’ve been asked at work to refrain from bringing eggs, egg cartons, egg products etc into the office as it can trigger a reaction. We’ve also been asked to refrain from eating eggs on the days we’re at the office with her - this means on lunch break (if we happen to go out of office for lunch) but also prior to coming in to the office too (ie breakfast).

I’m more than happy to comply with refraining from consuming eggs at work or in work hours as I know how terrible such a trigger would be for her.

However, I eat eggs as part of my breakfast nearly every morning. So after I eat breakfast, I take a shower, brush my teeth and then get ready for work.

Another coworker of mine (not the one with the allergy) found out about it and called me an AH and said I’m putting our coworker in danger. I explained everything I do to mitigate the risks but she wouldn’t hear any of it.

So, AITA?

And no, you’re not imagining it—rates of allergies really are rising. The AAFA states that “the rates of allergies are steadily rising,” while the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s Food Safety and Inspection Service notes, citing the CDC, that food allergies are “a growing food safety and public health concern.” So yeah, you might only remember that one kid at school who wasn’t allowed a party pack or slice of birthday cake, but according to the USDA, food allergies affect “1 in 13 children, or about 2 students per classroom.”

#10 Aita For Proving That My Nephew Does Not Have Food Allergies?

Everyone is mad at me and I’m going to be honest and say I don’t I don’t understand why. I’m 17F, by older sister is 22. Nephew is 4. Around 2 weeks ago my sister and nephew moved back in with my parents and I because she lost her apartment.

I have no issue with that, but my sister claims that my nephew has all of these different allergies. She claimed he was allergic to onions, garlic, bell pepper and all spicy peppers, and a lot of other stuff. My sister has always been a notoriously picky eater, and a lot of the things she claimed he was allergic to were things that she didn’t like to eat.

I didn’t believe he had these allergies, and it pissed me off that my mom started cooking differently and the food hasn’t been as good since she came back home (like no garlic???) I wanted to prove she was lying. She went out Sunday to run some errands and left me with little dude to watch. I thought it would be fun to make little pizzas for lunch. We made little pizzas with roasted garlic, spinach and bell pepper. Just like I thought, he ate them no problem and loved the food. I took pictures while we made the food.

When all of my family got around for dinner, I showed my mom what my nephew and I did for lunch, and told everyone he enjoyed his garlicy pizza.

My sister got extremely mad and started yelling and screaming at me at the dinner table, she accused me of trying to poison her child. I told her that I was just proving what a liar she was and told her she was a bad mom for not feeding her kid food she didn’t like and telling people he’s allergic so he can’t try them. My mom ended up sending me to my room. I’m being punished because I did something “dangerous”, but in reality I knew my sister was lying. I need to know if I’m a jerk for exposing her for this and I just can’t see it. AITA?

#11 Aita For Saying That Someone Else’s Kid’s Allergy Isn’t My Problem And Leaving A Restaurant?

So, to celebrate my son’s graduation and with most people around here being vaccinated I took the family to the local hibachi for some dinner.

My family of four sits down and soon we are joined by another family of four. They are nice enough and when the time comes to order, the father says that one of his daughters has a dairy allergy and asks that her food be made without butter. The waitress says “No problem, we will make everyone’s without butter”. The father says, her allergy isn’t that serious and as long as her serving has no dairy, it should be fine. The waitress repeats “We will make all the food at the table without butter”. I say that we would like butter with ours. She replies “Sorry, at hibachi we make all of the food together and we cannot risk her getting sick so all of the food needs to be made without butter”.

I reply that we are not even together. Plus, I say you can make her food in the back. There is no rule that the food needs to be made together. The father agrees with me and says they do it all the time. At this point, the waitress says they are very busy and they can’t do that. So I got up and said we are leaving because someone else’s allergy should not affect my dining experience. Then we went to a different hibachi restaurant 10 minutes away. My wife says that I was an a-hole because I ruined my son’s graduation dinner and I should have been more thoughtful to the girl’s needs. Plus, now the other restaurant has lost a reservation. My point is that the girl’s needs could have been met in other ways by the restaurant. Plus, my son likes his butter.

#12 Aita For Causing My Girlfriend's Friend To Have A Severe Allergic Reaction

Two days ago my (29M) girlfriend (24F) came over my place and her friend (24F) tagged along, we just had a heatwave so my gf and I were in the pool (her friend wasn't). I'm a little bit of a jokester and I thought it'd be funny to push her friend into the pool. As soon as I did this, both of them started freaking out. I was pretty confused and my girlfriend helped her friend out. This is when things went to hell. Her friend started developing hives and my gf was yelling at me to call an ambulance because she's having an allergic reaction I WAS STILL CONFUSED but I called triple zero. This is when my girlfriend informed me that her friend had 'cold urticaria' (an allergy to cold) and is reacting to the cold water. I didn't even know that was a thing. Everything happened so fast, her friend started complaining about being dizzy and having shortness of breath. Thankfully the paramedics showed up, injected an epipen and then took her to hospital - she is fine now.

Just to be clear - I had NO idea about her friend's allergy but now my girlfriend is mad at me because "I shouldn't be pushing people into pools anyway" and she's making me feel even more guilty by calling me a jerk etc.

AITA?

For people living with severe allergies, avoiding a trigger isn’t always as simple as just checking a label. As Dr. Khadj Rouf writes for The Psychologist, “Living with severe allergies is a daily negotiation” that extends beyond managing a medical condition into navigating social spaces and relationships. “Avoid the allergen and carry emergency medication” is the standard advice for those with food allergies. But Rouf points out that it’s rarely so simple. Rather, she explains, “there’s a high degree of emotional labour attached to it.”

#13 Aita For Telling A Customer Who Had An Allergic Reaction To Our Food That “It Is What It Is” ?

Context:

I am a restaurant manager for an Asian fusion restaurant, and some of our dishes do indeed contain peanuts. The customer did let the host know that they do have a peanut allergy, which was noted on their tab. The kitchen staff made sure that there was no cross contamination.

After eating the food, customer reported that they were experiencing a peanut allergy from one of the dishes and that they found an actual peanut in the dish. Though the reaction was a mild one, we comp’d their whole meal. I later found a negative review of the restaurant mishap on yelp. My son has a heavy peanut allergy, and I would never bring him to a facility that has peanuts.

After personally contacting the customer, I asked “if you knew that you are allergy to peanuts, why risk entering a facility that uses peanuts?” And the response was “peanuts are virtually everywhere, and most restaurants are very diligent handling with peanut allergy. Yet for some reason, your restaurant was completely different... why?” I felt as though I needed to defend my restaurant so I didn’t immediately apologize and found myself constantly saying “it is what it is”

Am I the jerk for defending my restaurant?

#14 Aita For Not Knowing My Daughters Allergies

Hey reddit, i don’t know who to turn to and i’m confused by this situation. I’m a 27 year old dad of a 6 year old. She is my life, i always put her first and i love her a lot. My girlfriend and i separated when our baby was 2. It was more of my decision instead of hers and she’s been a jerk about it ever since. We agreed on handling it outside of court just to save us time and money. I agreed on letting my daughter live with her and giving her mom 500 dollars each month. I see my daughter mostly on weekends, but i can make plans with her whenever i want. Her mom keeps her medical records and never informs me about anything. I’ve tried asking about it, but her mom always answers with “she’s healthy”.

Wednesday afternoon, i took my daughter out for some icecream. She got to pick out the flavor and toppings. She ordered snicker flavored ice cream and added some candy. I found out later that she has an allergy towards peanuts, but not before she had an allergic reaction in the icecream place. I literally had to rush to the closest ER and they took care of her from there. It was a very close call and i’m still upset about it. My daughter is okay now, but her mom is mad at me for letting my daughter eat peanuts. I didn’t know she had an allergy to them! I told her this and she went off, she claimed that she told me, but i was too busy doing something else.

She’s been bugging me about it ever since and i’m starting to feel guilty, AITA?

#15 Aita For Refusing To Give Up My Seat On A Flight Due To A Person Who Has A Guide Dog And Is Visiting A Family Member In Hospital Due To The Fact That I Have A Dog Allergy?

I won't be going into specifics, since I'd rather avoid being identified.

I have a severe dog allergy. I can have varying disease of severity when it comes to my reactions when I'm exposed to dogs. In short, being in a closed environment with a dog is out of the question.

Earlier today, I was boarding my flight with my friends, since we're all going on vacation together. As I'm boarding, I find that one of the passengers is boarding with a Golden Retriever, with a guide dog vest on it. I want to make it clear that I'm not questioning whether this was a guide dog or not. This was also a fairly small plane, since the flight would only take around an hour. As mentioned, I cannot be in a confined space with a dog. I told one of the flight attendants my concerns, since I could have potentially ended up in hospital if I had to fly with this dog. The flight attendant informed the woman with the dog, who goes into hysterics, saying that she is visiting a sick family member, and can't afford to miss her flight. I'm not sure how sick the family member in question was/is. The flight attendant asked if I'd be willing to miss this flight and catch the next one that would be leaving in around 2 hours. I was offered a seat in first class if I was willing to do this. I said that unfortunately I wouldn't be able to do this, since I'd paid for my vacation. Due to the size of the plane, the dog would not be able to go in the hold. The woman started insulting my character, saying that I was "heartless" for putting my vacation over her sick family member.

I got on the plane and sat with my friends. As I did this, a woman in a nearby seat told me that she wanted to inform that I "am the biggest jerk that she's ever met." I didn't respond since I didn't want to cause a confrontation. My friends haven't said I'm in the wrong, but have kept making sarcastic jokes about the situation.

AITA?

Food allergens can be particularly difficult to avoid. Just think about it: eating out, going on holiday, attending celebrations, or simply spending time at school or work can all require additional planning and communication. Rouf points out that the responses from other people can make those situations easier—or considerably more difficult. In fact, she says, “Trying to manage other people’s responses can make it tempting not to bother eating out at all.”

#16 Aita For Telling My Roommate That I Don’tcare About Her Boyfriends Allergies?

I (24F) have been living with my roommate Layla (25F) for about 10 months. We have a 2 year lease so I really want to fix this so we’re not miserable for the next year and to start I need to see if I’m in the wrong.

Layla started dating Kyle about 6 months ago. Kyle has severe food allergies to shellfish, nuts and soy, as well as a lot of more mild/moderate allergies.

I use nuts and soy a lot in my cooking and some occasional shrimp. At first, Layla would tell me that Kyle was coming over and I would just adjust whatever I was planning on making if it was something that would be aerosolized (mostly nuts) and this was fine. He’s never had any reactions at our apartment from my food.

But it’s slowly escalated and now they want me to not keep any ingredient in the apartment that could cause him anaphylaxis, even if I’m not actively eating or cooking it while he’s over.

I’ve refused and they’ve both pushed back a lot on it and I snapped a little and told them I don’t care about his allergies. I can accommodate him to an extent but I don’t care if the contents of my cabinet make him uncomfortable. He doesn’t need to be near my things at all. They’re being very dramatic and insisting I’m gonna “unalive him” with my selfishness by having closed jars of nuts in the kitchen I pay to use. But I’m not going to have my diet restricted by someone who doesn’t even live here.

Layla isn’t speaking to me at all right now and I feel a little bad now because I do understand how serious allergies are but I also think they’re overextending boundaries by telling me what I can or can’t eat when he’s not even here

#17 Aita For Getting Mad At My Mom For Continuously Forgetting About My GF's Allergy?

My girlfriend and I have been together nearly 2 years now and have spent a bunch of get togethers with my family in that time. From the beginning, I told my parents that my girlfriend has a serious pork allergy. Whenever a family occasion comes up that involves them cooking, I always remind them about the allergy because they always seem to forget (and my family seems to eat a lot of pork, go figure). Last year at Christmas, my mom cooked the turkey with bacon layered on the top of it despite knowing about my girlfriend's allergy, and my girlfriend couldn't eat it.

So, since the holidays are coming up I reminded my mom a few weeks ago about the allergy. Today at lunch I was talking to my mom and brought up Christmas Day. She then says, "I'm cooking the turkey with bacon on top". I just looked at her and said "If you do that, (insert girlfriend's name) won't be able to eat it like last year". Then she got all upset and says "Fine, I just won't cook it with bacon like I had planned then" and I said, "You don't have to do a whole separate plan" and she got pissed off and said "Good I won't." She then asked if my girlfriend can eat ham and I just looked at her incredulously and reminded her that no, she can't, because ham is also pork. She just huffed at that and walked away from the table and didn't sit down again.

I feel hurt because I feel like there's an inconsiderate aspect to this by both of my parents not keeping in mind my girlfriend's allergy and me having to continually remind them. I'm mad because if I hadn't said anything today, the turkey would have again been cooked with bacon on it and my girlfriend wouldn't have been able to eat it, which I personally would find upsetting if I were in her shoes and it happened for a second year in a row. I know this isn't a huge deal in the grand scheme of life, but AITA for getting mad at them about this?

#18 Aita For Not Accommodating My Friend's Daughter's Food Allergies On A Group Holiday?

I 31f am going on holiday with my husband 30m and some of our friends. I organised the trip and we have a groupchat. We are bringing our son Alex 5m and it is a family trip with friends bringing their kids as well. I have a friend Emily 29f who has a daughter 5f Ava who has many food allergies. Ava and Alex are good friends.

To save money when going away, we will be cooking for ourselves most days in our apartment. I agreed to shop for food staples for the trip, and I created a list and everyone added things to create a final list. Emily messaged to say Ava can't eat most the food on the list and sent me an edited version swapping out ingredients for things Ava can eat.

The swaps made the shopping way more expensive, and others replied their kids won't eat most the things on the list and wanted to stick to the original one. I told Emily that this wasn't in our budget, and told her to separately get food for Ava, and we will adjust splitting the food bill to just include her and her husband instead. She argued that Ava will feel left out on the trip as she has to eat something else separately, especially seeing Alex eat what everyone else does and Ava can't eat that.

Normally when we meet up, we do all eat the same food as Ava, which is fine as that is one meal once every 1/2 weeks, but we are going away for 10 days, and I don't think I can eat that food everyday.

Sometimes people’s responses come from a place of what Rouf (somewhat generously) calls “well-meaning ignorance.” For instance, she recalls being asked at a café whether microwaving a cake would destroy its milk and egg allergens. Other times, she notes that responses can also include “deliberate recklessness,” where people “may just ignore a person’s allergy as ‘faddy’ and assume that they know better than the sufferer.” The distinction matters, but Rouf also makes a sobering point about what can happen when those attitudes go too far. Speaking of the latter, she warns, “This kind of attitude can cost someone their life.”

#19 Aita For Defending My Son's Decision To Not Invite His Friend To His Birthday Party Over A Food Allergy?

Hi everyone. I won't be going into specifics with regards to names or ages.

So my son has a birthday party every year. At this party, he always has food that consists of one of his favourite flavours of cake, such as chocolate, pineapple etc. This year, he has decided that he wants the theme to be strawberry flavoured food. Now, I'm sure most people will agree with me that having birthday parties with a food theme isn't an issue. However, in this case it is.

My son has a friend in his class. This friend has been to every birthday party my son has had. The problem is that this friend has a Strawberry allergy, so you can see where the issue would stem from. My son has said that he wants to have a strawberry flavoured food theme for his party, and that his friend likely won't be able to come due to his allergy. I told my son that if that's he wants, then he's allowed to do that, since it is his birthday.

My son told his friend about his plans. According to my son, he made it clear that him not inviting him wasn't to be malicious and that the only reason he wasn't invited was due to his food allergy. According to my friend, his mum thinks I'm being a jerk by supporting my son's decision to not invite this friend, since she believes that a birthday party needs to be inclusive.

AITA in this case?

EDIT: The child's allergy isn't life threatening, however, if he were to eat a strawberry he would have to go home to say the very least.

#20 Aita For Not Allowing My Son's Friend Who Has A Severe Food Allergy To Visit My Home Because I Don't Want To Go Through The Trouble Of Preparing For His Visit?

My son met his friend ("Jake") in school last year. They are a lot alike and became quick friends. My son has been over many times to Jake's house for sleepovers, but Jake has never been to ours. My son had asked my wife and I a few times if Jake could come over. At first I told him maybe, but after he persisted and kept asking, I told him that it was up to Jake's parents but if they said okay then it was fine. I only said this because I suspected that most likely they would not allow Jake to come over because of his food allergy. Deep down I didn't really want to invite him over because I knew it would mean a lot of prep work for us, but I wanted to be nice about it and also my son kept badgering us about this.

That was a mistake on my part because Jake's parents agreed and were really happy to let him spend the night. They said most of his friends' parents won't invite Jake to spend the night because they think it is too much trouble. This was the first time anyone had ever invited him over, and Jake was really happy.

I have explained to my wife what I've written in my post and admitted that I don't want to invite Jake over because it would be too much work and the responsibility is too much. She told me I was a selfish jerk for not only lying to our son but not being willing to go through a little extra trouble for Jake, but we are talking having to go on a 48+ hour lockdown in our home to guard against anything that could trigger his allergy. That is too much.

AITA?

#21 Aita For Abruptly Leaving My Boyfriend And His Family Dinner After They Refuse To Respect My Allergies?

I (19 F) recently got the chance to safely see my boyfriend (20M) family for a dinner. I work as a paramedic and would reject going to any plans my boyfriend had with me wanting to go see his family due to COVID.

I recently got the chance to have a two week vacation and decided to accept my boyfriend offer to see his family. I asked my boyfriend what would be served and just checking in to see if what they would make won’t have Seafood/ Shellfish since I’m allergic to them.

The day comes and I had a good time with them up until the time for us to eat, I noticed the food they had mostly had either seafood in it or was entirely seafood. I asked if they had anything else but my boyfriend insisted I should just eat a little to not be disrespectful. I stood my ground and informed him and his family I’m severely allergic to seafood and after they insisted that they won’t serve me or make anything that doesn’t have seafood, I thanked them and left.

Today, I got angry text messages from my boyfriend upset that I disrespected him and his family and wanted me to apologize to them but I’m not going to.

AITA?

“Living with allergy,” Rouf goes on to explain, “also means taking safety precautions.” This might include making decisions based on things others wouldn’t give much thought, like choosing a holiday destination based on its proximity to an emergency room, and ensuring they have access to emergency medication at all times. But someone with an allergy, Rouf explains, is also tasked with “trying to keep those [precautions] proportionate in a world which has differing levels of understanding about the condition.”

#22 Aita: My Girlfriend Is Allergic To Milk And Doesn’t Want Any Milk Products In The House

My (27M) girlfriend (24F) of almost two years and I recently moved in together. It’s been mostly good so far except there has been one drama and it’s all to do with my girlfriend’s allergy to milk. She’s been allergic to milk since she was pretty young, and I mean severely allergic. The last time she accidentally consumed it, she went into anaphylaxis. That was 4 years ago.

I expected that when we moved in I’d be able to eat and drink anything I want but my girlfriend is very strict on the “no milk products in the house rule.” I find it very inconvenient and i don’t think it’s fair that I’m not allowed to buy normal milk or cheese or yogurt etc. for myself. I don’t understand why she can’t have her almond milk and I have my cows milk.

Yesterday we went to the supermarket and I decided hey I’m going to buy a small carton of milk for myself because almond milk is disgusting. My girlfriend immaturely took it out of the shopping cart and we ended up having an argument in the middle of the store over something as minor as MILK. She kept saying that she’s scared she’ll accidentally drink it (I don’t see how that’s possible) so I told her that she is being extremely paranoid and she can’t control what I choose to eat or drink and i put it BACK into the cart. She told me I was being an inconsiderate jerk and walked out of the store.

I gotta ask... aita?

#23 Wibta - Bringing A Food Dish To An Org Function When
So I am going to an organizational function where we are asked to bring snacks to share as this will be a multi-hour event. I had already planned a dish and bought ingredients, when at the last moment an announcement was made that a singular person has sever allergies to multiple food types within a family of foods. Pretty common foods, and very uncommon allergy. My planned snack would have several of these allergens in it. They later expanded that allergy list to include refreshments that also have these ingredients.

So, seeing as this affects only 1 out of over 200 people attending, Would I be the jerk for bringing the snack I already paid for? I cannot imagine this person asks restaurants to remove this very common list of ingredients from their premises before they enter. And I plan on labeling the food.

EDIT: to clarify, the instruction was "DO NOT BRING ANYTHING WITH THESE INGREDIENTS"
© Photo: NoSatisfaction4474

#24 Aita If I Confront The Chef About Not Taking My Allergies Seriously?

I get lunch at work. it’s a nice perk. Too bad I have not used it for months out of fear of having another anaphylactic attack.

I have a somewhat rare allergy: sunflower seeds and oil.

People often think i’m lying about it since I’m not allergic to peanuts… the more common allergy.

Anyway at first I asked each day “is there sunflower oil in this” but they kept rolling their eyes at me so I stopped…

other allergens are listed on the board, but the only way to find out about sunflower oil is to ask.

of course days later there was sunflower oil and I had to go to the hospital in an ambulance.

I told the chef about this in a polite way but he still seems angry when I ask and has said nothing about IDK maybe putting it in the board, telling me another way I can check warning me about when it might be used.

so i stopped going for lunch. also the pandemic has been annoying and i didn’t want to add to that… but we are going back to normal lunch soon so… I want to go back but i feel like talking to him first and letting him know how mad it makes me to be made to feel … like i’m unreasonable when I ask every day. his food nearly ended me when I didn’t ask.

also I tried going today and just asking and he said “no sunflower oil” but i still had a mild reaction and … i just kinda don’t trust him on this issue… there are a lot of demanding people at this job and i try not to be one. so either i do this talk and be annoying or just forget about lunch forever

It’s this balancing act that comes to the fore when allergies become a source of conflict. Someone with a severe allergy may have very good reason to ask the people around them to take certain precautions, while someone unfamiliar with the condition may genuinely not understand why a particular request matters. When those different expectations collide, what looks like a reasonable safety measure to one person can look like an unreasonable imposition to another. With that in mind, it’s hardly surprising that so many of these situations leave people wondering, “AITA?”

#25 Aita For Telling The Waiter I Had A Nut Allergy?

A while ago my oldest sister, her boyfriend and I, all went to dinner together. When ordering, I stated I had a tree nut allergy.

Her boyfriend freaked out, asking if I needed an epipen just in case, and I told him no, and that it was mild.

My oldest sister stated that I shouldn’t have told the waiter I had a nut allergy because I haven’t seen an allergist nor have an epipen. Her boyfriend’s little brother also has a nut allergy, but more severe. They have gone to the hospital and have used multiple epipens on him in the past.

My sister said that by saying I had a tree nut allergy, I was taking away from those who are severely allergic to tree nuts.

I just didn’t want tree nuts and the discomfort of not being able to breathe properly.

Is this wrong to do?

I might be the jerk because:

My sister said that it was similar to people having symptoms of ADHD but not actually having ADHD, and telling everyone they did. It ultimately undermines issues that people with ADHD encounter. I can understand that.

I’d also like to add she said it was OK to tell family but not OK to tell restaurants because it’s not serious enough.

#26 Aita For Causing My Sister To Have An Allergic Reaction?

The other day I (16f) decided to do a bit of baking before I left to visit my friend. I decided to just make something for myself, never intending to share. My sister (14f) is allergic to nuts so I try to avoid them when baking for my whole family, but I decided to make something for myself.

Before I left I reminded her not to eat the cookies that were leftover. I even put a note on-top of the cookies in case she forgot.

About an hour later I got a call from my parents screaming at me because I caused my sister to have an allergic reaction. I asked what they meant and they told me that she ate the cookies I didn’t. When I tried explain that I gave her a fair warning ahead of time they shut me down and blamed me for it.

I really don’t think I did anything wrong, but AITA?

#27 Aita For Not Accommodating A Kid’s Allergy?

I’m a “class mom” for my kid’s home room this year.

Basically means we help out with arts and crafts and provide food for events.

I was in charge of the “welcome back” party this year.

Three days before the party the teacher wrote and said one of the kids in class has allergies and could I avoid bringing any food the kid is allergic to so she doesn’t feel left out.

I said sure I’ll do my best to accommodate.

I get the list. Dairy, peanuts, tree nuts, gluten, citrus.

I wrote back and said I couldn’t be sure anything made in my kitchen would be free of all those things.

The teacher sent me a link for a restaurant that would accommodate her and said I could get the food from there instead.

I looked at the menu and it would have cost $300 to feed all the kids from that place. The groceries for my home made food were $100 even. Already more than I’d hoped to spend.

I said I couldn’t do that for the whole class but I could get the kid whatever she wanted from there alongside the other food.

The teacher said I should be more considerate to the child’s feelings because she’s feel left out while the other kids ate something she couldn’t have.

I went ahead with the party as planned, and got the kid a meal from the restaurant.

I was removed from class parent after that. My daughter is disappointed because she was looking forward to having me volunteer this year, and now I’m considering contesting it. But I need outside confirmation that I’m not the one in the wrong here so I don’t accidentally embarrass myself or my daughter.

#28 Aita For Serving A Child Their Allergen On Accident?

I used to work at a noodle place, and one time a dad and his 3-4ish year old daughter came in. The dad ordered and then lightly nudged the girl so she would order her food- she (super quietly) ordered pad thai without peanuts, but I misheard her and thought she said without beans (it also comes with green beans)-so I ask "without beans?" to confirm that's what she said and she said yes I'm allergic, all while her dad was standing right behind her, and I even looked at him to have him confirm that's correct and he didn't react at all. So I put the order in, make note of the green bean allergy, the kitchen makes it, and I bring it out to them.

About a minute later the dad storms up to the counter saying that his daughter is deathly allergic to peanuts and how dare I put them in when she asked for them to be taken out. I said that I must have heard her incorrectly, but that I did confirm what I thought I'd heard while he was standing there and read the order back to them- he said that it was unacceptable and that "this restaurant should be ashamed" and that "we're lucky he isn't going to sue". My manager came to try and calm him down, but then afterwards pulled me aside to talk about the importance of allergies and how I needed to be more careful, even though I explained that I tried to confirm what I'd heard and wasn't being careless about the situation.

I really don't think I was in the wrong here because I TRIED to confirm the allergy and the dad sat by and said nothing. If my kid had an allergy that serious I would at the very least speak to the cashier at the end of them ordering to confirm that.

AITA (or am I in the wrong) for this?

#29 Aita For Not Eating Something I Have A Minor Allergy To?

When I was living in the barracks away from home and couldn't afford to go home for a holiday, I went with a friend to their family who lived relatively close. His family put out a big spread with all sorts of food.

His grandma apparently always makes this fruit salad that everyone tells her is so great. It's just a fruit salad with whipped cream on it. But, there were different types of melon in it. I have a minor allergy to melon. It won't end me, but it makes my throat and ears annoyingly itchy for a day or so.

She offered me the fruit salad which I politely declined and told her I was allergic. She got very offended and insisted that no one is allergic to melon and I should try it. Again, I politely declined.

My friend took me aside later and told me I had upset granny and was selfish for not eating the fruit salad despite my allergy since it wouldn't end me. Afterwards, he told me he wouldn't be bringing me to any family functions ever again.

AITA for not sucking up a day of uncomfortable itchiness for granny?

#30 Aita For Disinviting A Couple Because Of Their Kids’ Nut Allergy?

So my sister’s getting married next month and she’s put me in charge of personally inviting everyone since it’s not a very big crowd. I called one of my cousins up to invite her and she said the environment needs to be completely nut-free because her new stepson has a severe nut allergy. I told her I’d get back to her in a while. Then I thought a bit more about it. I’m sure my sister would have no problem trying to accommodate them, but I wouldn’t want us to be held responsible in case someone slips up, makes a mistake, and something terrible happens to him. We’d never be able to forgive ourselves. So I called my sister and suggested we ask my cousin and her husband not to come if they’re bringing the kid. She said it’s my call ultimately. So I told my cousin that while we can ask the guests and caterers to comply, we won’t be able to completely eliminate every minute chance of some nut particles appearing during the wedding, so we’d be more comfortable if her son didn’t come. She seemed a bit disappointed. Later she put up a post on Facebook about how discrimination and insensitivity against people with nut allergies is completely overlooked, and how “people will keep getting away with it unless we speak out.”

EDIT: Ok, so I figured I found a way to make it work. I’ll tell the caterers to make it nut-free and will tell all the guests to be fully vigilant about not getting any nuts and if they can, to not consume any nuts the day of the wedding and to double-check that their clothes, bags, hair, vehicles etc not have any traces of nuts either since it’s a child’s life on the line. I called my cousin back and told her that if she’s still willing to come, I’ll do my due diligence to make it safe. I told her that I only told her not to bring him because a child’s life is a huge responsibility but she said she might’ve oversold the severity of his allergy and that its not quite life-threatening. I asked why she said he “might die” and she said that’s just her due diligence to make sure I take it seriously enough and she never thought I’d take it to the extreme. Anyway, we both felt really stupid, but she and her husband are coming with the kid and I’ll do whatever I have to but it’s a lot less stressful now knowing he’s not going to die.

#31 Aita For Not Doing The Dishes Because I'm Allergic?

I have a severe fish allergy. My hands became red and swollen whenever I come into contact with fish. It's not really painful, but it's unpleasant and uncomfortable, and I can't move my hands for a few hours. My parents are aware of this, therefore they warn me whenever they wish to eat fish. They fried some fish yesterday, and I went out. When I returned (about 5 hours later), the dishes had not been washed. As soon as I walked in, my mother told me I had to do the dishes because we had agreed that was part of my chores. When I told her I don't touch fish, she said she didn't care because it was my responsibility. I told her about the allergy and she said she bought the cream (it helps to make it less swollen)

I didn't do the dishes. I won't pass away for touching fish, but I don't want to have my hands all swollen for a day. My parents were mad, but I think I'm in the right.

edit: I can't wear gloves. I've tried them a couple times but I ended up with my hands all swollen anyways. I wish I could tell why but I genuely don't know because I often use it to wash daily and it's okay.

edit 2: I'm sorry I didn't say this before but I'm 24. Thanks to everyone calling me a child !! I miss that lmao,,,

#32 Aita For Asking My Parents To Cater To My Nut Allergy?

I've been stewing on this for a while now, and thought I'd post just to get some outside perspective.

In my family it's been tradition for as long as I can remember to get Chinese takeaway on Christmas eve, and for as long as I can remember, every year my mum orders a bunch of dishes with nuts in, despite the fact I have a severe nut allergy. This year, she ordered the food, and I asked her if she could possibly call back and ask them to do the same dishes without nuts in. I told her if she didn't want to, I could call them and ask myself. What ensued was an hour of my parents calling me difficult, demanding, selfish and that it was a waste of my mums time for them to put her in a telephone queue again. My brother kicked off because he preferred having the nuts in the food and they took his side. They then told me the solution was to just "eat around the nuts" even though that is completely not how my allergy works. I ended up going and sitting on my own for the evening, feeling like I'd done something wrong. This is probably just a tiny incident but I feel like this is representative of my parents overall attitude towards me, to the point I feel physically sick with anxiety whenever I go to visit.

AITA for creating a situation which could have been avoided just by not challenging them or am I right to feel paranoid and ridiculed whenever I go and visit?

#33 Aita For Not Fessing Up To Causing A Coworkers Allergic Reaction?

Last week one of my coworkers started to feel unwell and another coworker took her to the ER. She was having an allergic reaction. She has an allergy towards peanuts and thinking back on it I probably caused the reaction since we both had had to use the same computer to check order and I had peanut butter on my waffles that morning. I definitely don't think I washed my hands after either. Once somebody got the call she was ok they asked us all in a group who had had peanut butter that day and I stayed completely silent.

Well, yesterday she came back into work. She was fine and everything, but apparently the trip to the ER still cost her $300 after insurance plus the money she lost not going to work for a two days. Our coworkers all sympathized and a few started saying whoever had the peanut butter should have to pay. Since I wasn't part of that conversation. I just heard them from across the room, I just focused on my work an tried to avoid the subject for the rest of the day.

Edit. A ton of people have brought this up so just so you guys know I will bring up worker’s compensation and she did have an epipen.

#34 Aita For Refusing To Have Any Pets Inside Our House Due To My Allergies And How I Was Raised?

So here’s the situation. My fiancée (25F) and I (26M) are planning our wedding for next year, and we’ve already got a house and a young daughter together. The issue is about pets in the house. My fiancée comes from a family where they always had multiple pets inside. Her mom currently has like four dogs and four cats all living indoors. Meanwhile, I was raised differently. We had dogs, but they were outdoor dogs. We took great care of them, but they never came inside.

Now that we have our own place, I’ve told my fiancée I don’t want any pets indoors because I have severe allergies to cats and dogs. My fiancée actually recently got tested and found out she’s allergic to cats and dogs too, she just never realized it because she grew up around them. Plus, I just wasn’t raised with the idea of animals living inside, and I feel strongly about keeping the house free of pet hair and potential damage. I’ve offered to get an outdoor dog and make sure it has a great setup with a nice doghouse, plenty of space, and all the care it needs.

But my fiancée and her mom think I’m being unreasonable. Her mom even said that I’d have to eventually accept a dog inside the house and that it’s just how they do things. They kind of make me feel like I’m the jerk for sticking to my boundaries, even though it’s largely about my allergies and how I grew up.

So, AITA for not wanting pets inside and insisting on keeping any dog outdoors?

#35 Aita For Forgetting About My Girlfriend's Allergy?

I was on my way home from work last week and found a box full of almost malnourished kittens they were so skinny. I honestly was heartbroken and immediately picked up the box and took it home after stopping by the market and buying some cat food to keep them for a few days until I found a home for them.

When I got home, however, I forgot the all-important detail that my girlfriend is severely allergic to cats. And not the kind of allergy that makes her skin blister and she sneezes a little, it's the kind where her glottis can close and she chokes to death. She had told me about how severe her allergies are, but we NEVER come into contact with cats or anything that might cause a reaction so I forgot about it.

When I got back home, the first thing I did was go to our room to let her know what I had done and she panicked. The first thought I had was to get rid of the cats, but was I just going to throw the cats back outside and they'd die?

My girlfriend said she was worried about cross-contamination as I had touched objects around the house and thought it would be wiser to spend the night at her brother's house. I apologized profusely to her, for everything, for forgetting about something so important, for putting her in danger, for not being able to eliminate the cause of the problem at home. She was the most understanding person in the world and said that it's okay but that I would have to figure out what to do with the cats since they couldn't be with us.

I spent the night blaming myself immensely for what I did and it only got worse when her brother called me furious for "playing with her allergies" and that I just "forgot" because I wasn't the one who stayed at her bedside more than once after an anaphylactic shock that nearly unalived her.

Am I the jerk?

#36 Aita For Making My Son Shower Before He Comes To My House Because Of His Sister's Peanut Allergy, And Not Letting Him Come Over When He Didn't?

I have a son (14M) with my ex-husband, as well as a daughter (12F) with my current partner. My daughter has one of the most severe peanut allergies her doctors have ever seen. To give you an idea, someone touching a peanut, touching someone else, that person touching a surface, and then my daughter touching that surface would cause a reaction, and has before.

Because of this we have to take precautions beyond what's normal for a peanut allergy. We can't eat out, we deep clean the house frequently, and any guests have to wash their hands when they come over and avoid touching stuff. It's a lot and I can understand my son being frustrated, but the issue at hand has to do with his father's house.

My son also has two young half-brothers at his father's house, who unsurpisingly eat a lot of peanut butter and the like. Obviously we can't police what another house does, but it does mean my son has to take additional measures to keep his sister safe. Chiefly, he has to shower immediately before leaving to go to my house, otherwise he could have contamination. This is because as I said just him being in that house and than touching things could cause a reaction for his sister.

He didn't do that last week, he showered, but only the morning of, several hours before I picked him up. He refused to shower again, so I couldn't bring him and had to leave him at his father's. Now his father is accusing me of favoritism, and claims I'm abandoning my son. He also said some very homophobic things about my partner (Also a woman) and said I'm being obsessive.

#37 Aita For Making My Daughter Move Her Pet Rabbit Outside Due To My Stepson's Allergies?

I am a widower. My first wife passed away 6 years ago from cancer. A few years after she passed, I reconnected with a former girlfriend of mine (We ended the relationship amicably, but lost touch over the years). We started dating again, albeit long-distance, and we married this past January and moved in together this February.

There has been a major hiccup in all of this though. My daughter has a pet rabbit, she has had him for almost 5 years now. His name is Basil. Basil lives in my daughter's room and currently enjoys a lot of space: we converted her walk-in closet into a bunny pad, he is litter trained and she often lets him run around the house supervised. He honestly is more like a cat than what you would think a pet rabbit would be like. She has a little ramp for him to get on and off her bed and he will follow her around the house and everything.

Unfortunately, it seems my stepson is highly allergic to rabbits. It seems to be a pretty severe allergy. We've gone to doctors to try medicine, we tried banning Basil from the common areas of the house and had everything professionally cleaned. No dice on any of it. Just walking down the hallway past my daughter's room causes my stepson's eyes to swell and his throat start to close.

My stepson and wife are currently living in a hotel until we can make the house safe for him.

I told my daughter we will have to move Basil outside because him living indoors just isn't safe for her stepbrother. She is, understandably, very upset about this. I've tried to involve her in picking out and building an appropriate setup for Basil but she absolutely refuses to do so. She is mostly not talking to me, and when she is it is screaming, crying, and saying every hurtful thing she can think up towards me.

AITA?

#38 Aita For Ignoring A Mild Allergy?

A week ago, we was informed that we were invited to our neighbors kids' birthday party. And that the party would be on Tuesday (last Tuesday.) My kids are friends of his, so I thought it'll be alright to attend. But, I wanted to bring something. So I decided to bake a batch of cookies. My son told me that he had some sort of butter allergy, but it was mild. For one, I didn't think you could get butter allergies. But, it was mild anyway. So I decided to make cookies with the butter in them. After the party was over, they (his parents) kept the cookies for later. Because sadly, no one ate them. Well, Thursday night my neighbor gave me a call frantically asking what I put in the cookies. And I kind of responded with a cavalier tone "Whatever is in cookies," and then I suddenly remember he has a butter allergy. So I say "Oh, I put butter in them." And they get mad asking why I did that, and I told them I didn't think his reaction would be bad enough to the butter considering I was told it was mild. Anyway, the kid with the butter allergy didn't show up to school on Friday so I can't help but wonder if it was due to my cookies. My son told me it was no big deal, and how he only had mild reactions to butter. AITA?

#39 Aita Allergies And The Whole 30 Diet

My spouse has specific food allergies and has been on the whole 30 diet. They are near the end where they can eat specific foods. My teen and I opted not to join my spouse, but would eat meals along with her that were compatible with her allergies and the whole 30 diet.

I went to pick up my teen after school and we normally stop at Panera to get drinks on their subscription plan. While I was there I checked my accounts and noticed that we had discounts that would make 2 meals free. I called my spouse and asked if they could eat anything at Panera within the end of the whole 30 diet and their allergies. They said Panera is hit or miss for them on allergens and they couldn’t eat any of it.

We were doing leftovers, so I told my teen we could bring the two meals home and have them. When we walked in, my spouse became very upset and said I shouldn’t have brought them home knowing that she couldn’t eat any of it. I then said we could just stick them in the refrigerator and eat them at a later time when my spouse wasn’t around. My spouse was still upset and said just because something is free doesn’t mean I have to get it.

AITA?

WHATS CRACKIN

39 Allergy Disputes That Left People Wondering Who Was Actually Being Unreasonable