Life is complicated enough that sometimes it helps to get a second opinion on one’s behavior. Not every situation has a clear cut hero and villain and sometimes two wrongs really don’t make a right.

So we’ve gathered some of the most interesting Halloween themed stories from the “Am I the [Jerk]” internet community for your reading enjoyment. Get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to share your takes on these netizen’s predicaments in the comments below.

#1 Aita For Not Removing My Doormat Because It Scares My Neighbor’s Kid?

My wife and I (both 32) have been living at our apartment for 4 years and are both huge horror fans. We have had an art the clown door mat from spirit Halloween for 2 years now, it’s not a Halloween decoration it’s just what we like.

Last month (around the beginning of April) we had some neighbors move in across from us. They have two kids, one is a baby and one is maybe 3-4 years old. The first time we met them was a couple days after they moved in, we were all bringing in groceries and I introduced myself, shook hands, all of that. The dad says “still Halloween huh?” And I just laughed it off.

Since then we’ve come home 4 times to them flipping our doormat, and we know it’s them because we have a ring camera. We were fine letting them do it and just flippng it back until a couple days ago when we caught them doing it in person. We asked what the issue was and apparently their son is super afraid of it, even though the kid was right there and was acting completely fine. Not crying, not anything. The only one that seemed agitated at all was the mom, who swore at us and rolled her eyes and was just generally unpleasant. Haven’t interacted w her much before or since. My wife waited until they were inside and flipped it back over.

I stayed out with the dad and talked it over and he seemed fine. He said he understood it was our space and he’d talk it over with his wife and that his son was old enough to understand it couldn’t hurt him.

This morning we walked out and saw our doormat wasn’t even flipped over, it was thrown outside of the stairwell. We live on the 4th floor so it was a very deliberate thing.

My wife wants to report it to management but I’m just about tired enough of this. I kinda wanna throw it away, but I also wanna keep it. Idk, I’m just confused yall.

#2 Aita For Buying My Son A Halloween Costume?

I(34F) and my husband(35M) have a 5 year old son together. My husband was raised in a family where boys play with cars and girls with dolls. Son has a huge obsession with unicorns and asked if he could go as a unicorn for Halloween. My husband told him no and he would take him shopping for a boy costume.

I found one in his size and wrapped the costume up to surprise him. I gave it to him after school and he immediately went to put it on. My husband looks at me and tells me that I am trying to change our son to be girly and should have bought him a spiderman or superman costume. This incident happened over the weekend and husband is still fuming over it.

AITA for buying my son a halloween costume?

#3 Aita? For Ruining Thousands Of Kid's Halloween And Not Feeling Bad About It?

I live in a large neighborhood, about 90 houses. We are what's considered the 'rich' neighborhood. So our neighborhood as always been a hotspot for trick or treaters. We used to get about 700 - 1000 kids a year, I've always loved getting trick or treaters because my kids are teens now and don't trick or treat anymore. But in the last four years, it's gotten ridiculous. There's thousands of kids and their parents flooding the streets, people with hay in their rigs carrying kids around, trampling yards, littering candy wrappers everywhere, and the amount of small children walking around by themselves is APPALLING. People from the neighboring town of 30,000 people take their kids to my neighborhood.

I was annoyed, but I never really did anything about it till two years ago. My daughter tripped and broke her arm (we didn't think it was a break but we wanted to go to the er anyway to get it checked out) and there were so many people in our neighborhood, we couldn't get out. There were cars everywhere, lining the streets, parked in people's yards, it was horrible. We had to wait until everyone left (about 1 am) to go to the hospital. My daughter had to wait in pain for HOURS.

At that point, I was done. I contacted the neighborhood community and we managed to get some folks (cops mostly) to stand the at the gate with a list and only let in certain people. (folks that live here, family members, friends) If you wanted to get in, you had to be close to someone in the neighborhood. It was great, there were only about 300 kids in the neighborhood and after there was barely any trash. And, we're doing it again this year.

I recently told my sister what I have done, and she got really angry. When we were kids, we had to trick or treat in other neighborhoods because we lived in a trailer park with no other kids. She told me I was a horrible person for ruining thousands of kids Halloween. But honestly, I'm not too broken up about it. It was a hazard, if there was a fire or an emergency, no one would be able to get in to help. When I was a kid, there was never any cars lining the streets, the residences could get out if they wanted, it was never dangerous.

I don't think I'm in the wrong, but I've always respected my sister's opinion. AITA?

Info: there was no one in the cars. They were parked in the middle of the road and in yards so there was no way for me or an ambulance to get through unless every driver in that neighbor at the same time went to their cars at the same time and drove out. My daughter was 13 and in that awkward phase where she doesn't want to bother anyone for help, and said it didn't hurt that bad.

#4 Aita For Not Letting My Daughter Go To A Halloween Party?

My husband (34M) and I (34F) have 6 kids, our two oldest are our 15 year old daughter, Autumn and our 13 year old son, Thatcher.

Thatcher and Autumn are both at the age where they don’t go trick-or-treating for Halloween anymore, both of them have different parties they want to go to.

Thatcher and his girlfriend want to go as Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift. My son plays baseball and watches all sports, including the NFL. His girlfriend is into Taylor Swift. Autumn and her boyfriend want to go as Marie and Pierre Curie.

The issue has been Autumn and her boyfriend saying mean things to Thatcher and his girlfriend about their costume. The biggest issue is that they said that his girlfriend shouldn’t be Taylor Swift because his girlfriend is Black. We are white and live in a very white area, she’s one of the few Black kids in the district. Thatcher got into a massive argument with Autumn over this. We weren’t home when this happened but when Thatcher told us what happened, we spoke to both of them.

Thatcher was justifiably really angry, he said that it didn’t matter because anyone can be Taylor Swift for Halloween. Thatcher tries to learn about his girlfriend’s struggles and culture.

We talked to Autumn about this and she at first dismissed it. We pushed her and she wouldn’t apologize until we had to threaten to take away her electronics.

A few days later, she made a comment about how “dumb” the costume was and how they’re only going as it because they’re famous and how my son is just “following trends”. Autumn was talked to again and she apologized.

The last straw was yesterday, I had gotten a call from Autumn’s science teacher that her and her boyfriend were complaining about Thatcher’s costume and had made other kids uncomfortable, I apologized and she said that Autumn and her boyfriend had said racist things before and I asked why she didn’t tell me. She told me she emailed me. After talking for a bit, we realized the email in the schools system was wrong and I gave her my correct email and she said she’d help me get it changed in the system.

I talked to Autumn and she said that her and her boyfriend just “tell the truth in class”, she also admitted she wasn’t sorry for what she said to Thatcher.

I told her she wasn’t allowed to go to the Halloween party and she told me I was overreacting. I asked some of my friends for advice and they said I was being too hard on her. My son, however, is really upset and says that knowing she’s getting grounded for her behavior makes him more comfortable bringing his girlfriend over. He says he wouldn’t want to live with us if we didn’t punish her racism. AITA?

#5 Aita Because I Didn't Drive Around With My Husband And Kids To Trick-Or-Treat On Halloween?

So, this one is fresh, and I'm still getting a cold shoulder over it.

I'm going to give a bit of a backstory only because I think it's relevant. I've been married 14 years to an incredible guy and we ended up with 3 kids. 8 years old, 5 years old, and 3 years old. We both used to be pretty athletic pre-kids and both picked up I hate to say it quite a bit of weight. I had a bit of a health scare after our 3rd kid was born. And, I took my health more seriously and dropped a good bit of weight along with feel absolutely incredible in comparison to where I was before. I tried to take my husband on this journey with me... but he wasn't ready. He was half-committed to the effort.

So, boom. It's Halloween. All the kids are dressed up. Which was an exhausting effort in and of itself. And, we are heading out where I see my husband sitting in the van waiting for us to pile in. I stood there surprised. We live in one of those cookie cutter suburbia neighborhoods where we can walk door to door to all our neighbors without being on a highway or something. I told him we could just walk instead of having to pile everyone in and out of the car(strapping in car seats between each house too). He was totally against it said it would be safer this way and that it would be too much work to do all that walking complaining about being tired from work. Meanwhile, beside him there's a pile of candy wrappers from him snacking on our Halloween candy we were leaving in a bowl.

At this point I tell him if he's driving he can follow behind us in the car. And, he throws yet another mini-chocolate in his mouth and says fine. So, I walked the entire night in my Wonder Woman costume with my Captain Marvel, Spider-man, and Batman kids while he just watched us from the street. We got so many compliments and he wasn't apart of the experience. One neighbor told me I was the real treat of the night because of my costume and it helped cheer me up a little. He even put a little airplane bottle of liquor in my candy bucket. Ha.

We finish up and get home. Kids are in bed and we are sorting through the candy checking to make sure it's unopened. He sees the airplane bottle of liquor and kinda freaks out. I tell him that some guy gave it to me what I didn't notice is that had slipped his phone number in the bucket too. Basically all hell broke loose. I'm telling him it's not my fault he flirted with me but if he was there with me maybe it wouldn't have happened. And, my husband is all upset we didn't just ride with him and I'm just so over it. Then I tell him basically we don't all have to suffer because you don't want to help yourself be better.

AITA?

#6 Aita For Not Giving Away The Rest Of The Halloween Candy?

My job had a Halloween event recently that I (32F) purchased $100 worth of candy for. No one asked me to do it, but since I knew that we did not have the budget for the candy, I took it upon myself to purchase. I did make it clear to my co-workers that if any candy was left over from the event, I would be taking it home. Well, the day of the event came, and everything went great until we were packing up to leave, with a bag of candy left over, when another department asked if they could have any leftover candy for another event they were having the day of Halloween. Apparently, a lot of other departments had donated their leftover candy. I politely declined, no reason given, just said “no, that's okay” and finished cleaning up our area

The other department seemed surprised, and one of them made a cringy face before walking back to their table

I mean, I paid for the candy, and Halloween candy ain't cheap, shouldn't I be able to determine what happens to the rest ?

#7 Aita For Not Letting My In-Laws Continue To Be Late For Everything?

Married 16 years and my in-laws have never been on time for anything. Not just a couple of minutes late, usually 20-30 mins or more and they don't ever tell us they are going to be late.

On Halloween they were supposed to be here at 6:30 to go trick-or-treating, my kids are teens so they already had plans but cancelled to spend time with them instead. At 7:15 we called and they said they were '5 mins away'. 22 minutes later, they arrived without any concerns.

This inspired a new rule for me, I called it the 5 min rule. Basically, if you tell me you're gonna be somewhere at a time and aren't, after 5 mins I will leave. If we are meeting to eat or something, and you're late, we will order and eat without you, we will leave when we finish even if they are just getting there.

Tonight they had plans to take my kids out for dinner, they said they'd be here at 7. We talked at 2p and I reminded them of the new rule. At 7:05 they weren't here and had not called or anything, so I called them. They said they were 10 mins away. I told them to not bother with it, they tried to ask me to give them another chance since they live an hour away, and I said no way and stuck to it.

I feel like they are disrespectful by doing this and that they aren't valuing my time. AITA?

#8 Aita For Choosing My Budget Over My Boyfriend This Halloween?

I need some perspective here, this whole thing is so out of control

I (28/f) own my house and my bf (29/m) moved in January. We had a ton of early money arguments and agreed that we would keep to a household budget. Also, he agreed to pay down his credit card debt. I have more flexibility in my personal spending than he does.

Early after we moved in, my bf told me that as a kid he always wanted to live in one of the houses that were totally decorated for trick or treat and handed out full size candy.

Here's where I messed up. I took this as a comment and not a plan. When the end of September came, we went to the halloween store, and he was under the impression we had savings for this. I didn't know. We go over the monthly budget together, and it was never listed. When he found out that there was no halloween savings, we had an argument.

Afterwards I talked to friends who all said he had talked about trick or treat extensively and how much it meant. I chalked this one up to a misunderstanding on my part. So I came up with $500 my money, and went to him with an apology.

He decided to buy one big piece, an animatronic clown and some lights. It burned through the $500, plus he put a little on his own credit card.

He wanted another big piece and was mad I wouldn't put it on my credit card. I asked if he wanted to put up handmade decorations or spider webs but he said it would look cheap.

A few weeks later, we had a fight over candy. He was still stuck on buying full size bars. We easily get over 250 trick or treaters and I said we just don't have that much money. So we got the bulk bags of good small bars. I also had these little coloring books for the allergy and diabetes kids.

Jump forward to Halloween. Early kids show up and he is letting them grab handfuls. I remind him we have a ton of trick or treaters coming, and he got really annoyed. I had ordered a pizza for us. So I get it and go inside for about 10 minutes. By the time I came back out, the trick or treat bowls were empty. He had been dumping a third of a bowl in each kids bag and had given out all the coloring books to whatever kids came along.

He told me that I'd have to go run out and buy more candy on my credit card. I said I wasn't going to do that, and it wasn't my fault he just handed out 20 pounds of candy. He started yelling right there in front of the kids, and I told him to come inside. He responded that he wasn't stopping trick or treating even if there was no candy. I told him to have fun with the clown, and went inside.

He came in 15 minutes later. Then he demanded that I leave for the night so that he could clear his head. He argued it was fair because I had already eaten and it was my fault that trick or treat was ruined bc I'm cheap. I handed the rest of the pizza at him and refused

He left and went to a friend's house and I guess they spent the rest of the night drinking, handing out trick or treat candy and texting me how awful and cheap I am.

AITA?

#9 Aita For Not Getting Special Treats For A Neighbor Kid Who Has A Disability?

Every year at Halloween we give out chips instead of candy. My wife and I think it’s fun for the kids to get chips to go along with their candy. We buy ahead of time at Costco so there’s always plenty. What we don’t use will be saved for things like bbq later in the year so people can have their own bags of chips.

I have a neighbor Debbie who is really upset about the potato chips we give put because her kid don’t eat them. She thinks we should offer some other options to her kid because he has a disability. I don’t think that’s fair and I told her it’s extremely rude to ask people who are giving out free stuff for Halloween to change things for just one kid and I told her I’m not doing it. When her child comes and knocks on my door he gets chips like everyone else. I let the kids pick the types of chips from the bowl that they like and I feel like that’s more than generous. Debbie said other neighbors are accommodating, her child disability for Halloween and I should think of others. I’m older so I think a child should be grateful for whatever they get for free on Halloween and not expect special treatment for a disability when getting free items.

Edit: My wife and I decided we don't want to deal with it anymore and will be donating the chips to the local school and churches for their Halloween party. Lights off at our house.

#10 Aita For Not Taking Down Our Halloween Decorations?

My husband and I moved into this neighborhood about 2 years ago after we got married. We haven’t been able to celebrate Halloween the last two years due to Covid, it’s our favorite holiday so this year we decided to go all out.

We filled our yard with tombstones and skeletons. All of our bushes and trees are wrapped in fake webbing, the tree closest to the street having a huge 6 foot spider dangling from its limbs. The final touch was a huge rope web, that we added extra webbing to fill it out, that hangs from our roof all the way out to the street. We’re not into gory stuff so we got a couple of fuzzy spider decorations to place around the yard. It took us hours to decorate and we were so excited, my husband looked like a kid in a candy story.

Yesterday while my husband was at work, I heard a knock on my door. It turned out to be my neighbor, he looked absolutely frantic. I didn’t even have a chance to ask what was happened when he yelled in my face, “You need to take all this thing down!”

I was really taken aback, this neighbor has always been very nice to us. I’ve seen other houses decorate in the past few years, maybe not to this extent, but I know it’s not against our HOA rules. I decided to ask if that was his issue just in case.

He looked at me completely dumbfounded and started going off, “Cut the noensense. You need to put all this away. My wife has arachnophobia. Your yard practically gave her a heart attack this morning.”

I kind of messed up here and laughed. “I didn’t think our purple fuzzy spiders with big googly eyes would even scare the little kids in the neighborhood. You’re pulling my leg, right?”

He got in my face and practically stepped into my house, “You’re going to scare my wife. If you and your husband don’t take all this down I’m reporting you. I’m a retired police officer and I can make this a real problem for you.”

I started seeing red and getting really uncomfortable because I was completely home alone and my husband wouldn’t be home for hours. Even if I wanted to take it down, it would be impossible without his help. “Listen, this our first time getting to celebrate Halloween in our house and we really put a lot into our yard. We don’t even have any gory or graphic decorations. None of our spiders even look realistic. Can we please not do this right now?”

“I don’t care. Take it down or else.” He didn’t really give me a chance to answer, he just started walking back to his yard.

Our decorations are not scary, other neighbors have even said our yard is cute. We also spent a few hundred dollars decorating, it would be a huge waste to take it all down. I haven’t told my husband yet because I know he’s petty and will throw a fit (and probably decorate with even more spiders out of spite). I refuse to take down our decorations, this is really important to us and I just want to enjoy my favorite holiday with my husband. AITA?

#11 Aita For Reverse Trick Or Treating With My Wife?

Good evening.

This happened a few nights ago, but I just heard it was causing drama today.

My wife and I moved into our neighborhood a few weeks ago, and we live somewhat rural. We're in a small town, under 5,000 people, but have about 4 dozen homes within a 20 minute walk.

We know there aren't any kids in the neighborhood, and were told to expect no trick or treaters.

So, my wife and I dressed up in costumes we had easy access to, nothing controversial or inappropriate, and stocked up on candy. We made little baggies for each house in our neighborhood with about a dozen fun sized pieces of candy in each.

On Halloween night we went from house ot house, and about half the people opened for us. We'd give them candy, introduce ourselves, and move on. We started around 6:30 PM and finished around 8:30 PM. (We started far out, and moved back in towards home, towards a few people we had casually met.)

Today while getting the mail, my wife overheard a group of people talking about the new, weird, neighbors, who decided to take up a chunk of everyone's evening on a Saturday night.

That mixed with two of the houses on our route telling us that people don't do that kind of thing in our neighborhood, and one telling us we're going to burn in hell for celebrating a satanic holiday, has me thinking that A. We have at least one loony neighbor, but B. maybe we may have crossed a line in going out in the evening?

I'm dismissing the satanic panic right away, but with multiple people telling us we weren't welcome, and the stuff my wife overheard, I'm wondering, were we out of line?

Are we the jerks?

Thank you.

#12 Aita For Getting Annoyed With Parents Who Drive Their Kids To Affluent Neighbors On Halloween?

Within the past year, my girlfriend moved in with me into my home in an affluent neighborhood. For the past few years, the neighbors and I have seen a growing amount of people come to our neighborhood for Halloween. This has caused a lot of people to "turn off" for Halloween, which you'd think would get the crowd to lessen but it keeps growing. I was openly annoyed with this leading up to Halloween and my girlfriend would condemn it every time I brought it up because "Halloween's all about sharing", saying it shouldn't matter whether the kids are from the neighborhood or not. She'd also point out that many of these children probably live in bad neighborhoods where it's not possible to trick-or-treat. Not surprisingly, this year at both entrances to the neighborhood, cars line the streets.. some with out of state plates (I live in a suburb of a city which is just over the state line.)

Am I the jerk for getting annoyed with parents who truck carloads full of kids to a neighborhood they don't live in?

#13 Aita For Refusing To Pay For My Daughter’s Plane Ticket But Paying For My Youngest Daughter Who This Vacation Is Dedicated To?

Hello all, I have 2 daughters named Kate (23F) and Alexa (16F). For starters Kate lives with me rent free and bill free. She used to live with her mother full time but her mom kicked her out at 18. I don’t blame her mother though. Kate was absolutely terrible in her teenager years. She was rude, disrespectful and would steal,smoke, skip class,etc. Kate barely finished high school and was put in a continuation school. Since this though Kate is doing a lot better, she didn’t want to go to college but she works at a fast food restaurant and is saving up for her own apartment.

Alexa on the other hand is the opposite, she’s amazing in school, works, volunteers and still has time to do sports and clubs. I’m extremely proud of her and feel as if she puts too much pressure on herself. Me and my girlfriend decided to surprise her on a vacation. Alexa has always wanted to go there and it wasn’t as pricey as we expected. We planned this in early October.

I told Kate about the vacation and asked if she wanted to come, but she would have to pay her own ticket.She said yes and would give me the money before Halloween. Well she never gave me the money even after being reminded, so I booked the trip November 1 for the 18-21 of November. I told my daughter this Sunday at dinner and she was very excited, Kate then said “ you’ll have to cancel and hope they refund. I work those days.” I told her she wasn’t coming since she didn’t pay. She was confused and thought I was paying for her. I told her that she was an adult who worked and lived free, why would I pay. She got upset and said because I’m her daughter and that I was paying for Alexa so why not her. An argument then happened which resulted in Alexa and Kate crying and Kate saying she hated me.

Kate has been ignoring us until we apologize and pay her ticket, which I won’t. Well yesterday Alexa sent me a link to a video on tick Tock where it shows Kate crying and explaining the situation, but she lied about a lot of things in the videos and made Alexa and I look like bad guys. The video got a lot of attention and support. She even opened up a go fund me where she received close to 500 dollars. I showed my girlfriend and we were both livid, Alexa was also very upset about the comments which fueled my anger. When she came home a huge argument broke out and I basically kicked her out for the week.

She’s been posting on social media platforms talking about me, my daughter and girlfriend. My daughter even got some nasty messages on her social media. My girlfriend told me I’m right on this but my daughter told me to just pay for her ticket. I want to know if I’m doing the right decision, so help.

#14 Aita For Calling My Mom To Come Pick Me Up Early At A Party That Got Out Of Control, Ruining The Party, And Subsequently Getting My Friend In Trouble With Her Mom?

A few weeks ago I (17f), along with my friend,"Martiza"(17f) went to a Halloween party. We both got the jab, so we were all good there.

On the way there Martiza informed me that she had changed her mind about leaving the party at our agreed time and was more than likely going to spend the night and just skip class the next day. She told me this as we were in her car. I was going to be the designated driver on the way back.

I would've been fine with this if she hadn't waited to tell me the unilateral change of plans 5 minutes before we pulled up to the house. So I was already a little peeved when went into the party.

I knew I was either going to have to pay $121 (halloween rates IG) to get home or call my mom and have her come pick me up. I chose my mom. 1. Because I knew she would be upset if I paid $100+ for a 45 minute car ride. and 2. my parents have always made it very clear to me that I can call them whenever I need them and they won't hold it against me.

Anyways, we got to the party around 8:30. But around 9 a lot more people started coming in. Some I recognized because I do dual enrollment at my community college. Unfortunately one of the people that came in was someone I had French with. I tried avoiding him but he saw me anyway and proceeded to follow me around the party. Martiza had disappeared off the face of the planet like 2 minutes after we step foot into the door, so I was all alone.

"Mark" is 24. I have no interest in him. He is 24. Which is pretty gross and old imo. I dont want to date someone 7 years old than me. I'm also gay...so yeah. I've told him this multiple times. But he "wants to make me straight"

I get away from Mark and around 9:30 I call my mom and ask her to pick me up. I explain to her whats going on. I leave out Mark on purpose. I text Martiza and tell her that I'm leaving. She doesn't respond so I go looking for her. I spend like 40 minutes looking because I started on the top floor. But she was in the kitchen doing shots and says whatever when I tell her I'm heading out.

I go wait outside and Mark manages to find me while I'm waiting. I keep trying to walk away from him but he continues to follow me. I see my moms car pulling up at this point. She must've recognized my costume because she got from the end of the driveway, out the car, and pulled Mark by his collar away from me in like 2 seconds.

Lo and behold, Martizas mom is also there because Martiza had told her she was spending the night at my house. I did not know she lied. Her mom goes inside and starts yelling her name looking for her. Martiza comes out with her mom looking mortified. I'm already in the car with my mom. They leave in Martizas car.

So now Martiza is punished and had her phone and car taken away. She can only talk to people in school. She's mad at me and blames me for snitching. She's also upset that I didn't get punished and still have my "privileges". When she talks to me she's really passive aggressive, she ignores me a lot too.

so AITA?

#15 Wibta If I Wear A Halloween Costume That Makes My Friend's Partner Uncomfortable?

Hey reddit peeps. I really need some help here.

My (21M) bf, "Alex" (23) absolutely love Halloween. Our whole friend group loves the holiday and we make a point to have a Halloween party every year. We're sad that we can't have our usual party this year but we're still planning on having a little Halloween party thing on zoom, so we still have an excuse to dress up and get drunk together.

Anyway, our friend Sasha has been dating a guy (let's call him David) for about a year now. We don't have many complaints about David, he's pleasant enough to us (excluding a couple of slightly homophobic comments which he apologised for after he found out Alex and I were a couple) and (most importantly) he makes Sasha happy.

However, when we were talking about costumes on call the other day, things got a little weird. Our friend group consists of five girls and three guys. We're all pretty big AHS fans and the girls all decided that they were going to go as the witches from Coven (their costumes are absolutely stunning). Alex and I are planning on dressing as Michael Langdon and Mr Gallant. Anyways, we asked David about his costume and he told us he'd actually planned for the three of us to go as Ross, Joey and Chandler from friends. Now I love me some Friends but Alex and I have already bought most of the pieces for our costumes and we don't really want to change it at this point. We told him as much and apologised. If he'd asked us earlier then we'd have most likely agreed to this.

He left the chat about ten minutes later but nothing really seemed off. Until he texted me later in the day. He told me that he was uncomfortable with us going as Michael and Gallant as they often get shipped together and are most likely "fairies". David told us he was uncomfortable with us flaunting our sensuality at every chance we got and that it was making him uncomfortable. We apparently ruined Harry Potter for him when we dressed up as Remus and Sirius last year. Anyway, David is still insistent on us changing our costume.

We've also been accused of trying to isolate him as he isn't too into AHS. He can dress up as literally anything he wants, there's no rules.

I really don't want to make anyone uncomfortable and I don't want David to feel like he's unwelcome but Alex and I were really excited about our costumes this year. I know this seems like a stupid thing to be worried about but we don't want to cause trouble for Sasha as she really likes David and we don't want her getting caught in the middle of some stupid argument over a goddamn Halloween costume. I'd feel awful if we were the reason that they started to have problems in their relationship.

WIBTA?

#16 Aita For Making My Daughter Return A Halloween Costume

This happened in Oct and my daughter is still acting cold and Hardly speaking to me.

My daughter (F16) works an after school job 5 days a week. Her high school had a costume contest for Halloween. My daughter and her friends planned a group costume to enter. She went with her friends after school to buy costumes.

I picked her and her friends up from the store and they showed me their costumes. My daughter spent 80$ on hers. I was pissed that’s a lot of money to spend on something your going to wear for a few hours. Very irresponsible use of money. I told her as much in the car told her it was ridiculous. I dropped her friends off and took her back to the store to return the costume and accessories.

Her friends found someone eles to take her place in the group and they won the contest and a 100$ visa gift card to split. My daughter came home from school on Halloween upset she claimed she had to sit and watch while her friends had fun and she missed out on everything. I pointed out to her after splitting the gift card it would be way less then she spent on the costume and it was only a few hours but she didn’t want to listen to reason.

Now a month later and she is still moody and mostly ignoring me. My ex husband told me I made her miss out and she works so much she missed out on a lot of stuff with her friends and I could have let her have this. But at the end of the day I saved her 80$. I just trying to teach my daughter how to be responsible with money she could have gotten a cheap costume especially since I she would have only worn it for a few hours.

#17 Aita(31f) For Only Giving Kids In My Neighborhood Special Halloween Bags vs. The Regular Candy I Give Everyone Else

Halloween is one of my most favorite times of the year. My husband and I have two little ones so we know almost all the kiddos in our block through the kids/school. Usually for Halloween we get a swarm of kids who don’t live in our neighborhood because I guess we’re known for better treats here? Anyways this has caused problems for us because we usually make Halloween goodies for the kids with cool things in it usually ranging from $5-$10. We’ve run into cases where we’ve had so many random kids in the neighborhood that by the time kids I actually know come over, the goodies are all gone.

Last year my husband and I decided to just get a big of candy from Costco to give to the other kids and just save the Halloween goodies for kids we personally knew. Well afterwards my son came home from school and told me some kids from his school apparently stopped by our house(we don’t know them) and were mad they didn’t get the special bags. I do feel bad but we can’t afford to give a hundred kids these special bags, we usually set aside like 30 bags for all our neighborhood kids. AITA?

#18 Aita For Shaving My Baby’s Unibrow?

I have a baby girl who has a very thick unibrow. Of course I think she is beautiful, including her bushy little brow, but I am SO tired of the comments from other people. Literally on a daily basis, people tell me I should dress her up as Frida Kahlo for Halloween, jokingly ask if she has a caterpillar on her face, tell me dad must be really hairy, etc. Nobody seems to notice anything about her except that unibrow. So, I shaved a little separation into her brow. I used a tiny little facial razor that is very gentle on skin and made sure to take care of her skin afterwards. It didn’t cause any sort of irritation or issues and I’ve continued to do it every week or so. My husband finally noticed (I did it initially about a month ago) and demanded to know how I could possibly do something like that to our child. He’s angry with me because: 1) I didn’t run it by him first; 2) I’m going to give her body image issues; and 3) there’s nothing wrong with a unibrow. I told him when she’s old enough to voice her opinions she can tell me what she wants, but until then I’m going to keep shaving it so that people notice more than just her unibrow. He told me to post it on here to “prove” to me that I’m the AH.

#19 Aita For Telling My Husband That If He Wants To Say He Does Everything, Then He Can Go Ahead And Prove It?

I (25f) have been married to my husband (29m) for 5 years. I am a sahm to 2 kids (4f) (1m). While I was making breakfast this morning, DH was breaking down boxes so he could take out the trash and recycling that had piled up over the last week while we were all busy with Halloween activities.

A box filled with packing peanuts got spilled when he picked it up, and one comment from him and spilling them ended up turning into a big argument about how I don't help with chores around the house. For the record, the only 2 chores we agreed would be his responsibility were dishes and taking out the trash. Every once in a while I will ask for help with changing a diaper or feeding the kids the food I've already prepared, but the 2 main chores he has are dishes and trash. I take care of their laundry, I take them places during the day for their education and entertainment (library, children's museum, etc) I try to fit a load of dishes in during nap time while our daughter eats lunch to try and help when the dishes are starting to get out of hand, and sometimes if he's particularly tired after a day, he'll ask me to help with dishes so he can go to bed.

Unfortunately for the past week, both the trash and the dishes went neglected while we were running around doing Halloween activities with the kids. So in the argument this morning he claimed that he does everything and has to beg me to do even just one load of dishes a month. And now he's told our daughter that I'm being sarcastic because I left to go eat my portion of the breakfast I made for the family in our bedroom while he finishes figuring out how to get all the trash taken out, do a load of dishes, feed our son the eggs I made, and find a way to entertain our daughter and keep both kids out of trouble while he's busy. And that's still not everything I do, because I managed to find a minute to do the kid's laundry earlier this week and I'm the one that made breakfast before the argument started.

AITA for letting him prove he does everything if he's going to claim it?

#20 Aita For Not Taking My Niece And Nephew Out On Halloween?

I(32F) work as paramedic and work 10 hour shifts. We are short-staffed at the moment and I am working the over time that is given. My niece(4F) and nephew(5M) are all set and ready for going out on Halloween. My sister and BIL work different hours and will reach out to me if I am available.

Halloween is coming up and they are traveling Saturday for a funeral and will be returning Monday. They did ask me if I could watch them and I told them that I was working a 10 hour shift Saturday. Sister and BIL think I work too much and don't spend a lot of time with niece and nephew. Niece and Nephew will be staying with our parents. Three co-workers called out for Sunday and they filled two of the slots. I told them that I would take cover the shift for Sunday.

My mother asks me if I could take them out on Halloween. I told them that I could not as I had to work until midnight. She calls me and says that I will be ruining their first Halloween. I tried to explain that work is short staffed and is a priority. My sister texted me a few times calling me a horrible aunt and to change my priorities to my niece and nephew.

AITA for not taking my niece and nephew out on Halloween?

#21 Aita For Refusing To Go To My Son Halloween Party Since He Won’t Invite His Sister Since She Cheated

I’m going to host the event myself and I will do that for awhile.

In our family we rotate who hosts the family event. This Halloween party is being done by my son and everyone was invited but his sister. She (Amy) cheated on her long distance boyfriend about four months ago. I don’t approve what she did, it was messed up of her.

Now my son has taken her cheating personally, extremely personally. I had to tell him to shut up about it multiple times.

Now today I was talking with her and she didn’t know when the party was. I called up my son and he told me she isn’t invited. I told him I will not be going if everyone in the family is invited besides her. This is when the argument broke out. He called me some creative names for defending the slut of the family. I hung up after that.

I told my husband what happens and he is also not going now. My son is pissed and I am getting messages for not going to the party.

Edit this is a comment: He is 28 and she is 23. I have talked to him about it, he can’t stand sluts his exact words. He has never been cheated on from my knowledge.

She already did that ( apologized to the ex), and then they broke up. She didn’t hide it.

His attitude about this makes me think this will be a problem with him for a long time

#22 Aita (Wibta) If I Keep A Halloween Party Despite My Friends Wishes

I (14F) am born on Halloween and almost all of my birthday parties have been halloween themed. (I live in a country where trick or treating doesn't happen but parties occasionally do)

'Hannah' (15F) is a girl who joined our school beginning of this academic year so she hasn't been in the school for long. And didn't know about my birthday when she celebrated hers( important later)

So on Monday, I was sitting with my friends and the topic of what I wanted to do on my birthday came up and I said halloween party as usual. Suddenly, 'Hannah' speaks up and is like "no! You can't do that. You're copying me!" and I asked her why. She said that she had a Halloween themed birthday party in may (which is as far from October as possible) and that I should let her be the special one this year. I told her it was practically tradition for me to have a Halloween themed birthday cuz I'm actually born on said day.

(Now Keep in mind it really isn't a holiday in our country but people do know a bit about it but not that much.)

So she says, "just because your birthday falls on it this time doesn't mean you were born on it" and I'm just sitting there looking at her confused. Friend 1 asks her wth she's talking about. So she says " it falls on the last sunday of October. Just cuz you are born around that time doesn't mean that you have keep a party." And another friend is like "do you know anything about halloween?"

She basically refused to believe it doesn't change every year and kept on trying to convince me to have a normal birthday party. I kept refusing and she walked away saying that I'm just a copy cat. A friend said she was the one who copied me but I reminded them that Hannah didn't know about my birthday then.

Some of my friends tried to change my mind cuz she's new but others are happy to have two halloween parties in a year. I really don't want to change because last year I didn't get to celebrate cuz of the pandemic and so this year I was really excited for it. Also this is my last year in school and I'll prolly never meet these ppl again.

Edit: ok wow I have a LOT of birthday twins and now you guys have convinced me so I'm 99percent planning on having it

#23 Aita For Refusing To Give Candy To Parents Who Take Their Babies Trick To Treating?

My college has an annual event where local kids can safely trick or treat in the dorms the day before Halloween. The students are required to buy their own candy and have to pray they don’t run out before the event is over, which happened to me last year.

So tonight was this event and I was pretty strict with the “one candy per kid” rule, but I was really uncomfortable when a parent would approach the door with a baby (and I mean less than 1-2 years old) and expect me to give them candy on their behalf. This happened with parents who had other, more appropriately aged kids with them too, which was I guess more understandable. But mainly it happened with parents who had nobody else but the baby- they would just show up to my door holding a costumed baby and a bag and said “say trick or treat!” as if they deserve something for that.

After this happening more than a few times, I decided to put my foot down and deny candy to kids who weren’t old enough (can’t walk, can’t hold their own bag, doesn’t know what’s going on). From that point on I said to everyone else that night: “We have limited candy and want to make sure the ‘big’ kids get some.”

I wound up getting some criticism from a few parents, some made shocked or disgusted faces and one couple even said they wanted to complain to the resident manager of my building, who is 100% on my side on this.

Am I the jerk for thinking that it’s wrong for parents to use their baby, who is too young to remember their first or second Halloween, to get free candy for themselves by trick or treating?

**EDIT: I’m definitely NOT against giving candy to teenagers. Hell, I’ve even seen a few of my fellow students trick or treating at this event! And I’m most definitely not bashing new parents for showing off their kid’s cute costume. My problem solely lies with parents taking advantage of us and using their costumed baby to get candy for themselves and then getting angry with me because I’m refusing to “give their kid” any candy.

#24 Aita For Refusing To Have Halloween With My Family For Years After They Screwed Me Over On This Holiday Years Ago?

As the title says this happened on Halloween. I'm 25M and 5 years ago my parents wanted to go to my sister's house for Halloween. At the time I was still living with them, and I wanted to go to a party a friend was hosting. But my parents were adamant that I go with them instead because they wanted us all to be together. I still wanted to go to my friend's party and my parents suggested a compromise in which I go to my sister's party first. Then my friend's. I figured it couldn't hurt to do both, so I agreed since I liked helping my nephews with trick or treating. And that year I was wearing an inflatable ninja costume I was really eager to have fun in.

Well I was ready and waiting in the costume for hours. And by the time we finally took the kids out, most houses stopped giving candy and there was hardly anybody walking around. And we only went around the block, that's it. Then when I wanted to go to my friend's house my parents guilted me into staying because they needed me as a designated driver. I would have driven them home first and then gone to my friend's party. But my parents just kept drinking and refused to leave. So I lost out on going the other party and cussed my parents out for making me miss it and not even being able to enjoy my Halloween. They just said that it was too late, and what could they do about it. They didn't even attempt to make it up to me.

I refused to speak with them later. So they confronted me and I said I didn't even want to look at them because they broke their promise. Then I said that unless they could somehow pull a new Halloween party with all my friends out of their asses, then they had completely screwed me over. Then I left before they could say anything else to me. My friends were nearly as upset as I was. But my sister told me off and said I was callous because she had wanted me there. Ever since that year I only spent Halloween with friends.

This year my parents begged me to go with them to my sister's instead. I asked why and they wanted me to drive them. So I refused and said they just wanted a designated driver. And they'd already screwed me over before and didn't even attempt to make it better back then. And I didn't wanna just sit around watching them get drunk with the only real highlight being helping kids trick or treat. I hung out with my friends and we had a blast with a farmyard party. But my sister called me up on Monday furious at me because our parents were pulled over on their way home and got a DUI, and that this would have never happened if I had driven them. And now most of the family is pissed at me.

So AITA for refusing to drive my parents to my sister's house for Halloween because of something they did 5 years ago?

#25 Aita For Doing A Group Halloween Costume With My Stepdaughters That Their Mother Doesn't Approve Of?

I (35F) am the Stepmother to two lovely ten year old twin girls who I adore. I have been married to their father (38M) for five years and we dated for two years before that. I consider myself very close to them and we always have fun whenever they stay with me and their father.

They recently asked what kinds of movies I watched when I was their age so it led to me digging out some old classics most notedly the Parent Trap. Of all the older movies I showed them this one was their favourite I think they got a kick out of seeing a movie about twins. They even delighted in the fact that in their opinion I look like Meredith Blake (it's the hair I think no way am I as gorgeous as Elaine Hendrix). It has become an inside joke of us with me often putting on her voice and acting the part while they fall into hysterical giggles. My husband has even gotten into it and playing the clueless Nick when we get into this playful spirit.

The girls are staying with us for Halloween, they alternate who has them on holidays and whoever has them for Halloween is in charge of the costume. The girls asked if I would do a group costume with them I was touched and told them of course, and asked them what they wanted to do. I should have seen it coming, they wanted to do the Parent Trap, with them as the girls and me as Meredith. I found it harmless and agreed. My husband found it funny and said he'd even dress as Nick then.

I got a call from their Mother today telling me she'd heard of the costume and she didn't approve that she felt it wasn't appropriate. I at first was touched and assumed she worried about their stepmother being portrayed as a wicked gold digger and told her it was fine it was just an inside joke that had occurred that sparked this. That wasn't the issue, she didn't think it was appropriate for me to do a group costume with her daughters at all and that it was clearly lazy and I was forcing it as why else would her daughters want to do a costume from an old movie?

I got rather upset here but tried to stay calm on the phone and I told her she might not approve but it was harmless and i'd been in the girls life for 7 tears at this point. My husband who was in the room during the call could see I was getting upset so took the phone off of me and began to get into it with his ex-wife. Telling her that she could have all the issues she wanted but it was an entirely proper costume for their age and it had been the girls who suggested it. Reminding her it was up to him what they dressed as this year and he'd approved of it. I got him to calm down as he was getting upset and the call ended rather tersely.

I just feel awful about this whole thing and I wonder if I should just bow out of matching the girls in costume if it will prevent further problems. I just know this will be a bigger thing down the line.

#26 Aita For Refusing To Trade Halloween For Diwali For My Children?

Children involved are 3 and 4. Born in Canada, so far raised without any religious influence but neither parent is apposed to it. The father, lets call him Dave, and I have been separated since January 2021. Co-Parenting has been rocky at best. The relationship was riddled with emotional abuse, IMO Dave is a text book narcissist. Having finally settled in court, this is the first year that a custody agreement will dictate the division of holidays (alternating each year). This year, I am entitled to Halloween with our children. Please keep in mind, I have no knowledge of what a Diwali celebration entails and am going only on what Dave has informed me will take place. Forgive my ignorance or incorrect terms! (Additional info on Diwali celebrations are welcome!)

Dave approached me this morning to ask if I would trade years for Halloween - He would take the children this year and I would have them next. Dave explained that Diwali falls on Halloween this year and that his girlfriend celebrates. He stated that the children have been invited by her family to join in the celebrations. Dave stated that the children would be picked up from school, travel 20 minutes to their home where they will have dinner, do Puja #1 at 5:10pm, travel 1 hour to gf's families home, do Puja #2, have a snack, trick-or-treat and go to bed. They would then stay over night at the gf's families home to continue the Diwali celebration the following day.

Both October 31st and November 1st are my parenting days. Dave has not directly asked to have the children for Friday but in stating that they will sleep over and the celebration continues, it is presumed.

I am of the opinion that it is great for the children to experience other cultures and religions and welcome their participation in Diwali. However, the children loved Halloween last year and haven't stopped talking about it since! They picked out their costumes in august and tell anyone who will listen what they will be! I feel that with the travel and additional celebrations, it may make for a very rushed and tiring Halloween. I don't know how long Puja lasts but the time line does not appear to allow for much time to trick-or-treat. I do not want their Halloween experience compromised when they will ask again for another full year.

I have offered a solution to Dave that the kids would trick-or-treat as per usual but could spend Friday with the gf's family to celebrate Diwali. I also offered to drive the children the 1 hour to their family home, knowing that they will already be there and celebrating. This way, the children could experience both Halloween and Diwali.

Dave seems to think that I am trying to control his parenting and it should be a simple trade for Halloween this year for next. I feel that it is not simply a trade for this year and next because the children may miss out on the Halloween experience as a result of the switch.

AITA?

#27 Aita For Insisting On A Wedding On Halloween?

I know this seems like an obvious answer, but hear me out because I'm having some serious doubts now.

My fiance and I are trying to get married on Halloween of this year. Halloween is our favorite holiday and has been since we met and started dating 8 years ago in High Shcool. For a few years we talked about getting married and having a really elegant, gothic style wedding on Halloween, and we've been really excited to make that a reality finally.

Here's where I may be TA. My parents were teenagers when I was born, and 10 years later they both remarried and had my half-sibings, and now I'm the eldest of 6, with the age range of my siblings being from 4-13. At the same time, my aunts and uncles also started having kids, so I'm more than a decade of age of all my cousins as well, and there are a lot of them.

Obviously I want them all at the wedding, but as soon as all of them found out the date of the wedding they all got really upset. I thought that if we made the reception more fun and have a candy bar and dancing and fun, maybe even allow people to change into costumes after the ceremony, we could have a great compromise. However, this hasn't been the case. My aunts, uncles, and my parents want to go trick or treating with their kids, and put it all in my siblings and cousins heads that they wouldn't have their fun every year because I'm getting married that day. So now it doesn't even matter that I'm trying to accommodate, because I'm taking away the experience of trick or treating and dressing up around the neighborhood.

My fiance's family is older and is all for the Halloween wedding, so that's not an issue. But now I'm starting to feel bad because I feel like if we insist, our wedding day is going to be filled with disappointed family and nobody will have fun because they want to celebrate halloween their way. But this is a once in a lifetime event with the love of my life, and I want to share it with everyone we love.

WIBTA for insisting on this date?

#28 Aita For Making My Son Pass Out The Candy He Got From Trick Or Treating Because He Was Being Rude?

My son is 9 years old. We went trick or treating like we usually do and the night was going well except when we got to a house that had a bowl of candy sitting on the porch It said "Take 2 please". He puts his whole hand in there and grabs about 6 pieces.

Of course I corrected him, and made him put 4 of them back, explaining be needed to leave some for the others. From then on he had an attitude, and the last straw was when I told him to stop grabbing so much candy from people and he screamed "No!".

We had only been out for about an hour so I took him right on home. Took his candy bag, dumped it in a bowl and told him to come sit outside on the porch with me. He objected of course, as kids came by and took handfuls of his candy. He complained they were taking too much and I told him that he shouldn't have done the same then.

His father came home from work, asked why he was in his room crying, to which I explained why. He said it was really cruel to give away the kids candy just because he was taking a little too much. I said he needs to learn to not be so greedy to which my husband said that "Its ok, it's Halloween".

He said I was being a jerk, and that I should cut some slack for the one holiday that kids get to pig out. I don't agree, although I figured I could've done this differently. AITA?

Edit: No, I did not give away the entire bowl. And even if I had, I would have had no problem providing him more once he learned his lesson and apologized.

#29 Aita For Telling My Wife That She Needs To Get Over Being Upset With Me For Pulling A Scare Prank On Our Son?

Last Friday night I (37m) was hanging out with my daughter (10f) watching a movie. My wife (34f) was working late while our son (9m) was hanging out with his friend.

Around 8pm his friend's mom texted me letting me know that she was driving him home. I thanked her and then let my daughter know that her brother was on his way. She then suggested that we play a prank on him in which we jump out and scare him. I thought it would be a funny practical joke and--long story short--she and I ended up putting on scary Halloween masks, dimming the lights, and hiding behind a couch. I then texted his friend's mom and told her that his sister and I were watching a movie and to send him to the Family Room downstairs when he got home.

He got home and came in. We heard him come in and say "Hello?" and then come down the stairs. When he got close we jumped out at him and shouted.

Now; here's where I fully admit I messed up. I thought he'd just be startled for a second and then would laugh with us over the prank. But that's not what happened. We ended up frightening him WAY more than I'd anticipated. He first started running off and then ended up having a HUGE, trembling, crying, adrenaline dump for a long time. I felt really bad and so did his sister.

His mother came home not long after and ended up sitting with him, hugging and comforting him. Naturally she wasn't amused by my antics which I understand because--again--I screwed up.

However, she has stayed mad at me for all these days afterward. She will barely talk to me. I eventually got tired of it and told her that she needed to get over it. I screwed up but I didn't mean any harm. I just way underestimated how much our prank would scare our son. I also think that our daughter is seeing how she is treating me over it and is being made to feel way too bad over her idea that was just playful; not bad-natured. But she just says that I "should have known better" and won't seem to forgive me.

I get it; she's always been a complete mama bear. But it's not as if I don't love our kids, too. Was my prank honestly so beyond that pale that I deserve to keep being punished over it?

#30 Aitah For “Excluding” My Ex’s New GF?

I (29F) am divorced with an 9 year old daughter. My daughter’s father (32M) has been in a relationship with a woman named Stephanie for about 6 months now. She has two younger daughters (ages 4&5).

My ex-husband and I have had many conversations about how to ease my own child into their new “blended family” by making sure that she still has lots of time with her dad, not combining every single special event with the other kids, and keeping lines of communication open. Overall, the introduction has been positive, but my daughter has mentioned that the younger children can be overwhelming and sometimes annoying. However, despite the conversations, every single special event has been blended, for lack of a better word.

We’re coming up on Halloween and my daughter has trick or treating plans with her best friend and her family. Halloween is my custody time.

My ex-husband asked if he could come and bring his new girlfriend and her children. I said no, as I wanted my daughter to be able to have time with her friend without having the other little kids in tow. They are not officially her siblings in any way, and I feel that she deserves protected time just for her.

My ex husband says that I am purposely excluding his new girlfriend and that I should be more concerned that she doesn’t have many friends or others to go out with on that evening. I feel like that is not my problem and I am advocating for my own child without having her feel like she needs to people please or feel guilty. I am not asking my daughter her opinion as I do not want her to feel burdened with any guilt. I did also invite them to the Halloween event at her school that same week to help initiate balance.

AITAH?

#31 Aita For Inviting My Daughter's New Boyfriend To Our Family Halloween Celebration Much To The Chagrin Of Her Husband Who She Separated From Last Month?

I'm a 50-year-old man.

My wife and I have a son and a daughter. My daughter married one of my son's best friends. We took him in when he was 15 and treated him like one of our own. He was kicked out of his father's home, and we took care of him like our own. My daughter fell in love with him and they got married right out of high school. He went to college, while she took care of their daughter.

My daughter was resentful of the fact that she had to give up her dreams, and this created problems in their relationship. Her husband ended up having an affair and siring an illegitimate child. The mother was an addict and lost custody.

After months of back and forth, my daughter decided to reconcile with her husband. We were not happy with her decision but decided to not let our disappointment show when she brought him around. We treated him the same.

7 years go by, and last month my daughter decided that she cannot give her marriage a chance. I think we all knew that she was ashamed of her decision to reconcile. It came as a shock to my son in law because they were expecting another baby (which my daughter has decided to abort).

She also told us she is moving on and is already dating one of my friends' sons, a widower with a daughter my granddaughter's age and they are good friends.

She has known him since they were both kids and I'm more than happy about her finding love.

This Halloween, she brought her new boyfriend to the celebration and we welcomed him wholeheartedly. And in the pictures in the clear that they were acting like a couple.

My son in law (soon to be former SIL) showed up to my office and accused me of encouraging the break up of his family when he was trying hard to save it. He was also disappointed that I didn't invite his 7-year-old daughter (His daughter went to her grandparents. So I don't understand the accusations)

I understand that being alone on Halloween for the first time in two decades must have felt bad, but he is no longer my daughter's husband. My son also cut him out of his life.

AITA for supporting my daughter in her decision and maintaining boundaries with her ex?

#32 Aita For Letting My Kid Wear Horns All Year?

Around Halloween 2019 I (23f) got my daughter (now 5f) a pair of little red horns attached to hair clips. She has worn then almost every day since they are her favourite thing in the world. Last night we went on a social distance safe truck or treat our neighbourhood set up with my ex(35m). She wanted to stay at his house for the night so she could be with her step brother which I agreed to. This morning when I went to pick her up she was sobbing. When I finally got her to calm down she told me her dad took the horns and said she could have them back next October. Obviously I was pissed and demanded he give me back the horns and he told me she’s gonna get made fun of and how they make his mother upset because her granddaughter is “in love with devil horns she’s gonna worship him one day” and how I’m a bad mother for letting her wear them. It was honestly out of nowhere since he’s never commented on them before. AITA for letting my kid wear horns all year?

Update! Thank you so much for all the kind words! I had her decently young and am still trying to figure this Mom thing out but I’m so glad I made the right choice. We did get her OG pair back after he took them which seemed to be something I didn’t quite communicate in the post but we also ordered her a couple of new pairs of horns plus some other cute Halloween hair clips she loves! We have also started watching star vs the forces of evil and she loved it! Thank you so much for suggesting that show! As for ex he is on thin ice and I had a talk with him after she went to sleep and told him that if he cannot get over her wearing horns then he can just not see her unless she wants to see him.

#33 Aita For Telling My Sister In Law If Diwali Is Pagan, Then So Is Halloween

My (F36) brother (M32) lives in the US. We are from the South of India. He recently married my SIL (F31) there. She is a US citizen and catholic. We haven't met her in person till now. We were supposed to go their wedding in the USA last year when "that which must not be named" happened. They postponed their wedding to April of this year, but we couldn't go as we were under the full blast of the 2nd wave. Anyhow we urged them to go ahead with the wedding and we attended via zoom.

They have now planned to visit us in India from mid October to mid November. They will be staying in a hotel and attending family get togethers including my parents Diwali lunch (4th Nov) when they would be introduced to a large part of the extended family (all vax + tested)

Last week we were having a video call where my SIL told me she is super excited to celebrate Halloween with my Kids (F 7 and 5). I told her sure, we can plan a party with some friends and have some spooky themed stuff. She said, she wants to dress up and take my girls out for some Trick or Treat as auntie-niece time. I told her that here in India no one does that and people would have no clue why you are knocking on their door, let alone have chocolates or sweets ready. What I could do is, inform a few neighbours and friends, buy them sweets ahead and then take her+kids specifically to those houses. She got a bit irritated and told me to forget about it. I was a bit taken aback, but dropped it. I started asking about what she would like to wear for the Diwali lunch. Its an important festival for us and we believe in wearing new clothes that day. She said she'd wear the same dress she wore for her reception (a short white dress). I told her in India, white is worn by widows (though this is now outdated) and wearing new clothes is an important sentiment and we would like to get her something new (as a gift). Maybe an Indian Salwar or saree or if she is uncomfortable, a full length dress. She would meet a lot of elders in our family and we would like her to dress a bit conservatively as they would not be comfortable.

She totally blew up and told me that If I was going to be so pushy, she won't come to the Diwali lunch at all and if she can't dress up for Halloween then she won't dress up for a pagan thing and she said many other things which were rude about our culture. I was upset as I felt that I had done nothing to warrant such a reaction. I got angry and told her if Diwali was pagan, so was Halloween. She cut the call and hasn't spoken to me since. Apparently she complained to my mother, as mom called me and told me that she was our guest and we shouldn't insult her and told me to apologise. I feel bad and like an TA now. I don't want her first experience of our culture to be sour or ruin my parents' Diwali. Also I don't know much about US culture. So, AITA?

#34 Aita For Allowing My Daughter To Exclude The Class Clown From A Halloween Party Even Though Most Of The Girls Were Invited?

My daughter, Emma (11F), is planning her Halloween party. We’ve invited most of the girls in her class, since they’re all pretty close and she’s known many of them for years. However, there’s one girl in her class, let’s call her Lily, who’s known as the class clown. She is new this year. My daughter greatly dislikes her and made it clear she doesn’t wish to invite her. I am fine with that, she is in middle school and can pick the guest list

Lily’s mom found out about the party (I’m guessing from another parent) and reached out to me, asking why her daughter wasn’t invited when most of the girls from their class were. She asked me to reconsider and invite Lily to avoid making her feel left out especially since they are new to the school.

I told her that my daughter picked the guest list and she isn’t close to your daughter. She reiterated that she should be invited since most of the girls in the class are. I told her no again. She asked why and I told her the truth. That my daughter doesn’t like your daughter and finds her annoying. That she is the class clown and disruptive and my daughter doesn’t wish to deal with her outside of school

The mom called me an jerk and other parents are contacting me. Some saying I a in the right and others saying to invite her

#35 Aita For Not Cleaning For My Parents Halloween Party Even Though They Canceled Mine?

So this just happened and I am posting this for a third opinion. Also this was done on mobile so sorry for any issues.

A side note: I am a full time college student and a part time worker so seeing my friends is a rare occurrence. We had to start planning this party weeks in advance so we could make sure people could come.

I (18F) and my friend (18M) were planning a Halloween party several weeks ago and I suggested that we held it at my place. It seemed like the ideal place since it had hard floors, single story, friends were familiar with it, and it was overall the best place to have the party. He agreed and I got the approval from my parents to host the party here.

About two weeks ago my parents told me out of the blue that I was no longer allowed to host the party. They said it was because the house was not clean to my mothers standard even though I was not home all day and my brothers made the messes she was complaining about. I claimed that this was unfair since I didn’t make the mess and they shouldn’t expect me to clean the house even if I am not home, but they persisted.

I then texted my friend and he said he could host the party at his place and that there was nothing to worry about. I was joyed and I told my family that the party was still on.

Now my parents know that I am not a bad kid. I haven’t done any substance use ever and I have a 4.0. But my friend is different. So they tried to change my plans.

“What if you held the party outside here?”

“You could just put a projector outside and play outside”

“We don’t want you in a party with drinkers”

I deflected that and said that we couldn’t do anything outside and that we already changed locations.

So it’s today and my parents have their own party going on here, and they told me to clean the house today while they went out. Long story short, I only vacuumed and put my stuff away. When they got home though they were mad.

They tried to take my phone away and told me that I was awful for not preparing the house for their guests. I said that it was unfair that I had to clean a house for guests I didn’t invite and that I wouldn’t even see on Halloween. I am currently in my bedroom contemplating and I now here I am. AITA

#36 Aita For Dressing Up As A Handicap Sign For Halloween?

Before you freak out, I’m in a manual wheelchair. I was paralyzed from the waist down when I was 4, so to my memory, I’ve been this way my entire life. With my parenting, I learned how to be grateful, independent, how to adapt, and that my disability doesn’t hold me back from anything.

I was taught that everything in life happens for a reason, and being paralyzed honestly just made me stronger physically and mentally than I would have been. I make jokes all the time about my wheelchair because it’s who I am, it’s funny, and there’s no use in being sad and depressed about not being able to walk.

—

So for Halloween last year, I decided to dress up as a handicap sign. I used a large cardboard square and painted it blue on both sides. I used white tape to make the symbol on one side and then used battery powered lights to outline the symbol. Then I dressed all in white to be the other side.

I thought it was absolutely hilarious, but I recently told my best friend about it and he told me it was rude and I shouldn’t have done that. He says not everyone understands life with a disability and that is why stereotypes are often placed on me. He says I need to be more understanding of their perspectives and that it wasn’t right for me to make others feel uncomfortable like that.

#37 Aita For Telling My BF That I Don’t Care About His Opinion On My Halloween Costume?

My (21 female) boyfriend (20 male) does not like my Halloween costume. Halloween is coming up and my friends and I decided that we wanted to dress up as fairies. Halloween is the one day that it is okay for people to dress scandalously and we were taking full advantage. My friends and I ordered lace bodysuits with different patterns. Mine specifically was green with gold trim and butterflies all over it (very cute). The whole outfit consists of the bodysuit, sheer tights, plastic leaves on vines, jewelry, sandals, wings, and pointed ears. I told my boyfriend about my Halloween costume and he immediately said that he does not want me wearing the costume. I told him that he has no say in what I wear. He was not happy and told me that I should have asked him about my costume before purchasing it. He kept saying that I am disrespecting him by wearing this outfit in front of other people even though he would be with me the entire night. I finally told him that I do not care about his opinion on my outfit choice and that I would be wearing it anyway. He and I can usually settle and argument pretty quickly but this one has lasted for a few days. I still do not think that he should have any say on what I wear and I still plan to wear the fairy costume however, I fear that I was too outspoken. AITA?

#38 Aita For Telling My Husband That If He Wants To Make A Huge Deal Out Of Halloween, He Has To Foot The Bill?

We’re both 32, married for 3 years. We finally just bought a house, in Denver, CO. Meaning $$$. On top of that we’re making some minor updates, so money is tight.

Husband, Pete, is one of those people who has a thing about being the “cool” house on Halloween. Giving out the full-sized candy bars, being “cool” and “in the know” and giving parents beer or something, over the top decorations, etc.

I’m not AGAINST decorating, giving out candy, etc. I love seeing kids in costumes. But I’m just not into all the excessive spending and the whole meme-y “spooky season” thing. I think $50 for a few bags of candy and some cobwebs/spiders and maybe a pumpkin or two are fine for this year.

However, Pete wanted to go all out. He wanted to get that huge skeleton, all the little ones, etc. Get hundreds of full sized bars, cases of beer, etc. He got frustrated that I had no interest, and then finally I told him:

“If you want to do all this, you can do it out of your own fun/personal budget for the month, but we have more important things to save our joint money for right now.”

He got upset because he doesn’t HAVE the money he would need, since he already spent the majority of it on his video gaming hobby.

I said that we can do something bigger next year if he really needed to prove himself. Plus we have no way of knowing how into the whole song and dance people get in this neighborhood. The last thing we need is a ton of candy bars sitting around, I’m already barely squeezing into my size 6 jeans lately.

#39 Aitah For Telling My Stepdaughter She Can Be Whatever She Wants On Halloween?

So, I (27F) have the honor to be the stepmother of a sweet, imaginative, and wonderful little girl (6). Her father and I get her every other weekend at the moment and she lives with her mother and stepdad the rest of the time. We alternate holidays every year. (I.e. she was at her moms last year for Halloween, so she will be with us this year)

One day, about 2 weeks ago, I was driving her back to our house and the topic of what she wants to be for Halloween came up. This little girl had a 10 year plan for what she wants to dress up as. She’s told me for a while now that she wants to be Ariel from the little mermaid this year. I told her that absolutely, we can do that!

Well, cut to yesterday, I’m driving her to our house after picking her up from her moms house and the topic of Halloween comes up again. (It’s her favorite holiday as well as my own) She all of a sudden says “Jacob (not real name of stepdad) Says that Halloween is for scary things only not cute things. That going as a mermaid was dumb!” And she said her mom agreed. Luckily we were at a red light, so I looked back at her. She was clearly upset and was starting to tear up. I was getting real upset with her. This is not the first time that her other parents have told her something was dumb or stupid for liking.

I told her that Halloween is the time of year when you can be anything you want! That’s the point! I told her that her idea was not stupid, and that she’ll be with us this year. So if she wants to go as Ariel or a barrel, we don’t care and she’s be cute no matter what! She thought that going as a “barrel” was a funny idea and it made her laugh. However, she still thinks that going as a mermaid is stupid and is now trying to think of something scary…

My heart hurts for her. But am I the jerk for going against her mothers feelings about Halloween? I always am afraid of overstepping boundaries in that department… My husband says not to worry because she’ll be with us, so she can pick whatever.

#40 Aita For Wearing The Same Halloween As My Friend’s GF, Causing Her To Cry And Break A Glass?

My friend (S) and his roommate were throwing a Halloween party. S called me a couple days before the party to chat and I mentioned what my costume was, and that I’d worked hard on it and was excited to finally wear it. S said he thought his girlfriend (D) was planning to wear a nearly identical costume. I thought this would be fun, and we could compare styles and have a laugh about the whole thing, take pictures together etc. The day before the party, S called me and asked if I could change my costume for the party.

Apparently D was pissed that I would try to “outshine her” (S’s words) and she told S that he needed to ensure I would not wear the same thing as her.

I said absolutely not, I’ve been working on my costume for a few weeks and spent a good amount of money to make it perfect (in my eyes). I said that I really didn’t want to lose out on having fun in something I’d worked hard on, and I didn’t have a ton of money to spend on a new costume. Not to mention most of the costume shops wouldn’t have a great selection the day before Halloween. S said he understood and would talk to D.

*as a note, D didn’t live with S and was not helping with hosting duties.

The party comes around and everyone is having a great time. After a few hours, I noticed D wasn’t there and asked S where she was…she was in S’s bedroom alone the whole time with the door locked. She finally came out four hours after the party started, only to see me and smash her drink/glass on the floor and then she started crying. It was a huge scene and basically ended the party.

I felt bad because i really could have gone out and bought a different costume, and I never meant to make her cry. So, AITA?

#41 Aita For Not Being Willing To Share Custody On Halloween

Essentially, my daughter is 4 yrs old and this will be her second Halloween since her mother and I broke up. Last Halloween, all I got was a simple picture of her costume and a short text saying she had fun. Now, baby momma is trying to ask if she can come pick her up for an hour or two and take her trick or treating.

I’m really not about it. I have a full day of activities planned and I feel like baby momma’s being intrusive, especially this close to the holiday.

AITA for not being willing to share time?

#42 Aita For Wanting To Cancel Going To Neighbor's Annual Halloween Party Bcuz Boyfriend Refuses To Wear Costume?

Our neighbors throw this LUX Halloween party every year. 🎃

Dry ice, flashing laser lights, awesome music, "haunted house" tour in basement for kids, cool "adult beverages" upstairs for grownups.

Photo booth, ice slide for shots, pro actors dressed up doing tarot & palm readings; they go all out & it's wild.

Neighbors are very specific that it's invite-only WEAR A COSTUME. A costume Halloween party.

He never wears one and I always do.

Once I got him to let me at least put some blood "tears" under his eyes, but he washed them off later in the bathroom after we got there.

I feel stupid wearing this elaborate costume I've been thinking about or working on for weeks and he's wearing, like, jeans and a long sleeve black Tshirt. Forget a couples costume; that will never happen.

He won't even do a simple last minute "joke" costume like "chick magnet" putting a little felt baby chick 🐥 on his shoulder or "Salt Bae" just grabbing a salt shaker & some dark circular glasses & short-sleeved black T.

I asked if he'd just put a toboggan and a flannel shirt on this year and say he's Jacques Cousteau, but no way.

Everytime he shows up not wearing anything, our neighbors ask why he didn't dress up & I can tell they are not pleased.

I begged again; it's "no" once more.

So now I don't even want to go. He says I'm being "silly."

They go all out to throw the neighborhood this beautiful, huge, unique, superfun party and he can't make a minimal effort to comply with the "come in costume" request.

Burns me up. And embarrasses me when he's the only one there who didn't do anything.

AITA?

#43 Aita For Giving Movie Vouchers For Halloween?

My son attends half day kindergarten. I just picked him up and has to deal with some moms. I'm writing this in the car just to calm myself down from dealing with these people.

I know this is ridiculous and I never thought I would be writing here but here goes.

My son has 17 kids in his class so I decided to do something nice. Through my company I get discounted movie tickets to give away to clients. So I put 17 envelopes in my son's backpack for his teacher to put in each other kid's Halloween treat bag today.

There is no problem with this. It's a private school and All the parents agreed to send treats for every kid in the class. No problem with religion or economic hardship.

The problem came when I got there to pick him up. Three moms were waiting for me.

They wanted to know where their ticket was and if I had extra for their other kids?

What? I just thought this was better than more candy. But they are upset with me because now they will have to spend money to use their Halloween treat.

I think all the kids go to see movies. The voucher is good for one kids movie admission, a small soda, a small popcorn, and a small candy.

But it seems that I'm the jerk for only providing for the one kid in my son's class.

I think that they are being greedy. And cheap.

#44 Aita For Not Taking Part In Halloween

So I (28F) come from a country where Halloween is not really a big thing. I think I was invited to one halloween themed party my whole life, it’s never been something I’m really aware of or cared much for.

I now live in a country where halloween still isn’t a massive thing but there is a huge expat population (especially from the US) who does take it very seriously.

So anyway last night a bunch of the kids on my floor of my apartment building decided to go trick or treating. I’ve lived in this building since it opened and it’s only with covid and new families moving in last year that the trick or treating is even a thing.

I didn’t buy any candy for this, nor do I have any in the house. I stuck a note to the doorbell saying “no trick or treaters, please” and carried on with work.

From 5:30pm until around 9:45pm my doorbell was going every 15-20 minutes and some of the kids were even pounding on the door. I ignored it and just put earphones in and carried on with work.

About half an hour ago as I’m having lunch, 4 mothers who live near my apartment came to my door and kept ringing the bell until I answered. I recognised a couple of them and thought maybe they needed something so I opened up.

They started saying they knew I was home last night and why was I acting like a grinch, was I too much of a cow to make children happy, they felt sorry for my baby (I’m 6 1/2 months pregnant) and overall harassing me for not taking part in halloween.

I did yell at them that they had no right to expect anything of me and that if they came back I would be calling building security and then I slammed the door in their face.

I don’t get why I’m obligated to take part in a holiday that holds no meaning or significance for me, especially when I had made it clear that I would not be involved in it.

AITA for ignoring the “holiday” and being aggressive to my neighbours when they confronted me?

#45 Aita For Dressing Like A Cockroach During Halloween?

I imagined that it wouldn't be too much of an issue especially considering the fact that I am not going for a hyperrealistic or particularly scary cockroach, I simply was planning on making a paper mache helmet and using the cicada wings i made from last year and dressing in brown. However, my parents are not particularly thrilled- my dad especially. He claims that it is "too weird" to go as. The costume idea is not scandalous or questionable at all, if anyone has any doubts I can send a picture of the idea.

When my little cousin [10M] came over, I was in my room preparing the costume. When I opened the door wearing a cardboard bowl-shaped thing [the helmet is paper mache] so I could go see in the mirror, my dad, sister [9F] and cousin were all standing across the hallway and could see me. My dad quickly rushed over and told me that I will not show the costume to any of the cousins/uncles + aunts and he seemed a bit angry. When he gets mad, his eyes tend to bulge out a little and he makes this face- this was somewhat present in this situation. I feel sort of bad-in my mind, it is either a), I am too old to be dressing up for Halloween or b) there is something wrong or inappropriate with being a cockroach that I do not understand. I don't think it was related to my school grades or anything either, as of currently im completely on top of everything and even a little ahead. He could very well be in the wrong here though, but I think I need another perspective [hence why I come to reddit]. I think jerk is a strong word, it's more so a matter of who is being irrational or unfair here. AITA?

#46 Wibta For Not Taking My Kids Trick Or Treating?

I (35M) have 2 kids (9M,6M). Context: I just started a new remote job so my medical benefits haven't kicked in yet. My partner has a job that requires them to travel and are currently away.

For the past 2 weeks the three of us have been dealing with a cold/flu bug. Its wasn't serious enough outside of taking your standard otc remedies and continue going to school/work.

Today, the day before Halloween, the kids got a bit worse and wanted to stay home from school. I also felt worse so I made the necessary arrangements (contacting my job/school etc). Kids are in bed watching TV and we'll be doing soup and medicine for our diet today.

Now my oldest has a fair amount of common sense so I did warn him that if they still feel sick enough to miss school tomorrow as well as today, then they can't go trick or treating. He understands this.

I gave my in-laws the heads up about the potential cancelation as they planned to join in our trick or treating tomorrow. They think I'm ruining the holiday for the kids. My partner, while agreeing with me, wants me to bend to their will because they don't want us to deal with the drama afterwards ie "you'll never hear the end of it".

While I get the point, I wasn't going to be completely heartless on the subject. I was going to make some Halloween themed snacks and do some kid friendly Halloween movies and allow them to wear their costumes all day tomorrow (just in bed) and buy them some discounted candy after Halloween to make up for the trick or treating loot they'll miss out on. But I also stand firm on the principle. If my kids aren't well enough to attend school, they they aren't well enough to socialize in this kind of activity.

So, WIBTA?

#47 Aita For Not Wanting To Help My Wife With Halloween Costumes?

Context: My wife 29F always makes the kids Halloween costumes. We have 3 kids 5F 7M and 9M. She did not have an amazing childhood and so I think she is constantly trying to make sure our kids do.

She home makes every birthday cake, diys the birthday decorations, makes pajamas for every holiday and always home makes the Halloween costume. She also does these theme monthly movie nights, where she creates this whole scene. For example this month was coraline, she make custom dolls for each kid, welcome home cake and the whole food spread.

This is all great but the problem is she expects me to help. All are kids are in activities, we both have full time careers, and I believe she stretches herself thin trying to do all this. And also expects me to. We have the money to just go out and buy stuff so I don’t get way we have to do so much. She says these are the things the kids will remember.

Anyway this all came to head as I’ve been out of town most of the month for work so she’s had to shoulder the full responsibility of the kids. This caused her to be behind on making the costumes and she’s stressed. She was asking me if I’d be able to create one of the costumes for her, she has the supplies and can walk me through. The problem is I just don’t feel like it. I told her we can go get a cheap costume, it’s not a big deal.

Well she refused and was up all night finishing these costumes. I told her this morning that they looked awesome and she just rolled her eyes. She was making coffee and I asked if she’d make me a cup, she replied go buy one. She’s been distant and cold. I was talking to my coworker and he called me out. Saying my wife is right, my kids will remember the effort my wife put in and they’ll also remember how hard I made it for her.

Now I’m feeling off, like maybe I am the AH. But at the same time I usually do help a bit, I was thinking this one time wouldn’t be a big deal since we were both tired.

So AITA?

#48 Aita For Moving Into A New Area And Not Being Home For Giving Out Candy On Halloween? I Forgot To Turn Out The Lights And Families Were Waiting By My Door

I just bought a house in a suburban area, and on the Halloween weekend my friends and I planned on going camping and making a party of it. We'd be going from Saturday afternoon to Sunday evening.

I've never lived in a place that does much trick or treating, I grew up really rural where every house was a mile from the next, and then I lived in a college town where the thing to do was throw a house party or go out to the bars.

So when I absentmindedly headed out on my camping trip leaving my outdoor lights on and pumpkins on my porch I didn't think much of it.

I got home from camping and there were a bunch of kids and parents waiting on my porch and when I was driving up I heard my neighbor yell to the group "she's not answering the door" and then I remembered Sunday was actual Halloween (my friends and I celebrated on Friday and Saturday nights)

I got home and the neighbor on one side asked me where I'd been, it was almost the end of trick or treating and I'd been away all day and missing their texts.

I said I was camping then driving a carpool of my friends home from camping. My neighbor said I'd really inconvenienced him by setting up my decor for trick or treat, leaving all the lights on, and then not being home, making him tell groups every few minutes all night to not bother waiting.

I said sorry, I didn't remember it was trick or treating that night.

The neighbor next door on the other side came by at that point and said that this is a really big neighborhood for trick or treat, it's a family neighborhood, and it wasn't neighborly of me to be away for Halloween and not participate.

I started to get frustrated because I hadn't even known Halloween was a big deal to them, I hadn't even remembered it was actually Sunday and not Saturday, and I felt like they were mad because I didn't do something that I didn't even know would be important to them. Like if one of them said Halloween is really important to them in advance and they'd like me to contribute I could of tried to be home or put out a bowl of candy or something.

I told both neighbors that it wasn't fair of them to be mad over something I didn't even know would be a big deal, and they said that it should have been obvious to me not to decorate for Halloween and leave the lights on and then go out.

AITA for being away on Halloween?

#49 Aita For Leaving My Wife At Home Because She Wanted To Drive In Our Neighborhood To Trick Or Treat?

Me and my wife been married 10 years and have 3 kids together. We both have always been a little on the chubby side but don't get me wrong cause my wife is absolutely gorgeous. In the middle of covid I saw the numbers about how it hit overweight people harder than others and I started eating right. Running. And put a weight bench in the garage. I only dropped like 30 pounds but in the past two years I've gone from being afraid of having my shirt off at the pool to bring proud of myself in the mirror.

So, boom. Halloween hits. I had been hyped all month cause I had like a Roman gladiator type costume to wear out with the kids. We always all wear costumes. I get dressed and we are both getting the kids ready and she doesn't even put on her robe to be like a fortune teller. And then she grabs the keys and says everyone ready? It was like 68F out and absolutely beautiful to walk our little neighborhood. I tell her the kids and I wanted to walk as we are standing in the drive way ready to go. She kinda stamps her foot and just goes back inside.

Me and the kids go out and have a blast they were all some variant of a warrior. So we looked pretty cool with our swords marching collecting candy. One of the houses had a little haunted garage and toys to play with. We stopped there for a bit and I had a few drinks to finish the night. Exchanged numbers with the family that lives there and headed home.

I get back home and after the kids get to bed. My wife explodes on me saying I smell like tequila and every since I lost weight I don't do the same things I used to do(we used to eat ice cream every single Friday like big Coldstone cups now it's like once every few months). She even brought up the phone number cause it was written down and I left it on the counter since I forgot my phone when we left. It very clearly had the couple's name on it so it's not like was from some floozy. Then she complains we all could have totally drove and I told her just because she doesn't want to better herself she didn't have to make me and the kids suffer.

It was harsh but I felt like I was being attacked for no reason.

So, AITA?

#50 Aita For Matching Halloween Costumes With My Friend Despite His GF Asking Me Not To?

I (21 F) have been friends with "josh" (21 M) since we were kids. Our moms were friends growing up and we were pretty much raised together. We have continued to stay best friends through all these years, and both attend the same college. A year ago, Josh started seeing a girl "Lydia" (21 F) and it eventually developed into a relationship. They have been officially dating for six months. I never met her when they were just talking because he didn't know where the relationship was going and obviously the times they were hanging out it was a no clothes party, and I didn't want to be a cock block.

When they did start dating, he introduced us asap because I'm his best friend. At first, I thought it was just shyness because I am a close friend of his, so you obviously want to get along with your partners friend, but it became clear very quick that she just had a problem with our friendship. This past Saturday there was a Halloween party at our friend's place. Lydia was bringing a friend and told Josh that she and her friend would be doing a matching costume. So, Josh asked me if we wanted to do a costume together. We decided to go as Steve and Robin from stranger things. I guess on Friday he told her this was happening and suddenly her tune changed, and she wanted to do a couple's costume. He saw what she was doing and told her no. So, she then texted me asking if I would change my costume. I said no because I already spent my money and didn't know If I could return it plus, I'd have to scramble for another costume. All of a sudden, I started getting SPAMMED from random numbers (probably her friends) calling me all sorts of names. The whole time Saturday she was sulking and one of her friends seemed to be consoling her the whole night. It just felt awkward. Josh is telling me we didn't do anything wrong, but I feel like he's biased cause he's my friend. I want a third parties' opinion. AITA?

#51 Aita For Leaving My Halloween Decorations Up After My Neighbor Asked Me To Move Or Cover Them Because Her Kids Are Scared?

I started to put up my Halloween decorations last week. I put up 2 twelve foot animatronics. A grim reaper and a zombie. They are currently off. An anonymous neighbor left a letter with a bag of candy corn asking me to take down the decorations and put them back up later in the season because her kids are too scared of them and want to cross the street. She claims this is a safety hazard. The decor is set back about 5 feet from the sidewalk and is not a hazard in any way. She also says if that's not possible to cover the faces with pumpkins or something less scary. Both faces are skulls right now. AITA if I leave everything the way it is?

#52 Aita For Putting Up Scary Halloween Decorations In My Front Yard?

Every year, I go really big for Halloween and Christmas. My house is typically the most-visited and talked about house in my big neighborhood. This year, I added some new pieces to my Halloween display that include a scary butcher guy and his deli case full of body parts. I also have skeletons climbing all over the roof, a graveyard with a grave digger guy, and a headless horseman. I typically have people of all ages say how much they love it and how fun they think it is.

This morning, some lady posted on Nextdoor about how horrifying and awful my display is, and that it scared her toddlers so much they cried. She went on a rant about how terrible of a person i must be to put such scary things in my yard in a family neighborhood, and I should respect others fears and take it all down.

I do it just for fun, and because most people enjoy it. I'm not a depraved psychopath and do not advocate for serial killers, as this woman alluded to. I think if you're walking down the street with your kids, and you see a house coming up that you think might freak them out, it's your job as the parent to either turn around and walk away, or walk on the opposite side of the street and try to not let them see it up close... Not to stand right in front of it, take photos, then put your neighbor on blast on social media while your kids are crying and scared.

So am I the jerk?

#53 Aita For Not Letting My 11 Yr Old Attend A Halloween Party At A Stranger’s House?

Today my daughter (6th grade) came home with an invitation to a classmate’s Halloween party this upcoming Friday. The invitation itself was handwritten by the child and xeroxed, and the only RSVP included was “text me if you can come!” with the child’s phone number. No contact info at all for the parents. I’ve never heard my daughter mention this kid before, and I do not know her parents. I asked around, and I don’t know anyone else who knows her parents, either. Furthermore, I find it very odd that the rsvp wasn’t the parents phone number. Who allows an 11 year old to bottom line a 5 hour party without providing their contact information for keeping tabs on it?

I told my daughter that since I do not know this child or her parents, nor do I know anyone who can vouch for them, I don’t feel comfortable dropping her off at their house. Bringing her and staying isn’t an option, as I already have plans for that time frame. It would be different if my daughter could tell me other friends who would be there also, but she cannot. I’m sure in all likelihood they’re perfectly nice people, but I don’t operate on the honor system when it comes to leaving my child with strangers, and I find it odd that there is no way of contacting them ahead of time. My daughter suggested texting the child and asking for her parent’s number, but I’m not interested in doing that because I think it’s bizarre that they didn’t provide it to start with and texting them isn’t going to change the fact that I do not know them. She of course thinks this is very unfair. I hate saying no and bumming her out, but I don’t think I’m being unreasonable considering she is only 11. AITA?

#54 Aita For Not Being Fluid Enough For Halloween?

My (25F) boyfriend (28M) and I are hosting a Halloween party this year. It’s our first time hosting a themed party like this, but I’ve always loved the idea of having one. I’ve watched countless DIY guides and videos about food, drinks, games, etc. I made a spider web out of paper streamers that covers our entire living room and took nearly 10 hours total to hang from the ceiling with lights to make a dance floor. And so much more. Point is, I’ve spent anywhere from 20-30 hours so far into this thing setting up, crafting, and buying supplies by myself.

Today my boyfriend asked if the guys could play a trading card game at the party. I immediately said I would be deeply offended if I set up a dance floor, beer pong, and decorations just for them to play a card game that we could play any other time. This is not a short card game - it can take a few hours depending on their decks and amount of players. On top of that, the music is going to be blasting so it’s not like they could hear each other anyway and it would take up the beer pong table. I offered that the guys could come earlier to play or wait until most people have left the party.

When I essentially shot it down completely, he said I “need to be more fluid” and I put my foot down and said if they did that I would likely get an Uber to a club and not come back until after. That I would feel very hurt and unappreciated. He backtracked, but things still feel a bit tense. On my end, feeling like that shouldn’t have even been on the table to begin with. But it seems small so I might be overreacting

#55 Aita For Not Wanting To Dress Up For Our Big Halloween Party At Work?

As it happens every year, there will be a Halloween office party with the usuals... good food, candy, drinks, music, etc. I’ve never had an issue with that. It’s also common to see people from our area and other areas dress up and/or put makeup on. Again, no issues with that.

This year, however, they came up with the grand idea for everyone in our area to dress up and wear the same costume. (Think the seven dwarfs, except we can repeat a character). They even suggested which store to get it from, which design. That’s where I am not comfortable. (And of course, we would pay out-of-pocket for the costume.)

I don’t like the idea of wearing something I don’t relate to. Also, I spend the majority of my day in my office, so it’s not like it will be obvious I’m the only rule-breaker.

I appreciate the people I work with, and I want to continue being an active member of the team, but I just don’t feel like going out of my way to buy something I will never wear again. (Plus, it would look ridiculous on me)

I hope it’s not hypocritical of me for encouraging the office to practice teamwork and cooperation, and yet stepping out on this particular activity.

#56 Aita For Buying The Wrong Candy?

It's Halloween in a new house in a new town. We moved five months ago. My (44M) wife (47F) wants to hand out full size candy bars so we can be the cool house. Ok. That sounds like fun I guess.

As I do all the grocery shopping, I buy 24 Hersey bars, 72 Sour Straw bars, and 24 boxes of Good'n'Plenty. (I priced it out on multiple websites and grocery stores before buying.) I will also pick up a 10 pound bag of Tootsie Pops / Tootsie Rolls later in case we have a lot of kids, as I have been warned we are in the "rich people" subdivision and there are a lot of kids that stop by. Maybe some Lemonheads too, idk.

My wife told me I was a jerk for buying licorice Good'n'Plenty candy. I disagree, because: A. Licorice is awesome, and B. It's only like 10% of the overall candy

#57 Aita For Being Upset That My Sister Stole My Idea And Included My Children?

Halloween is coming up and as someone with two children and a husband that adores everything scary it’s a big deal

I’ve got two children, Kasey (5) and Robin (5)

My mother asked to have Kasey and Robin on halloween, it makes sense as early the day after we’re collecting a kitten to surprise the children with as well as the fact we haven’t actually had a “no child” day in over a year now.

Still upset about not having the children I told my sister about an activity I had planned and asked if her daughter (8) wanted to be involved.

Both of my children invited a friend around too for a sleepover, I was going all out.

I spent a little over £30 on sweets, got them stickers, a colouring book, slime, some face paints for when it is halloween, some LOL friendship bracelets and a small doll each - husband thinks I went overboard and maybe I did, it’s their first real halloween and I won’t be there so I’m upset.

I had planned on making it a scavenger hunt, hiding it all around the house so they can look for it.

I got a film, was going to order pizza or McDonald’s so it’s a real treat, I told my sister.

Well, my children spent the night around hers and they come back all happy from them doing what I had planned

I don’t mind her doing it with her kids but I was looking forward to seeing the looks on my kids face and now I feel upstaged and if I do it I’ll be the one copying, it’s less special.

I told her as such, we argued and she is no longer bringing my niece around.

Kids are inviting two more friends though so might be considered a win for them.

Sister thinks she’s owed an apology and that I overreacted and caused drama for no reason.

AITA?

#58 Aita For Telling My Girlfriend I Won't Go See Her Play And Don't Want Her To Do It?

We've been together about a year. It's just a local theatre thing. They're doing Rocky Horror live. It's about 10 shows, all around Halloween, and she's playing Janet. She got given the role today. They said over the phone that they'd give her a free ticket for someone to come see one of the shows and she asked me if I'd come watch her. I said I didn't want to go and didn't want her to do it either for reasons that are obvious to everyone who's seen the movie. She's now mad at me. I want to make it clear that she does not see acting as a career and is doing something totally different with her life, she said when she auditioned that it would be fun and presented it as a one off thing, so it's not like I'm crushing her lifelong dreams, I just don't want to watch my girlfriend get groped on stage.

Edit: I saw the production last year. Same company, same theatre. Dude who played Rocky motorboated "Janet" and it's the same Rocky this year. And I looked it up and it's the same director, too.

Update: I took a step back, realised how crazy I was coming off, confirmed with a friend that I am definitely the jerk and apologised at length. I love my girlfriend, I trust her, and it's not enough to just say I support her, I need to actually do it. She's still mad at me and she'll probably be taking someone else to the show, but I am going to fully support her from here on out.

#59 Wibta If I Dress As Scooby Doo For Halloween - Because Of Racism?

Hi,

So I run a youth group and myself and the other youth leaders were talking about dressing as the entire scooby doo gang for halloween. I was gonna be Scooby, and get a Scooby Doo onesie from Amazon. It's the whole body costume with ears etc., and a hole for a face.

I was telling a group of friends what we were doing, and how I was going to then paint my face brown with some of the Scooby freckles etc. One in particular suddenly had a face was like I'd just slapped him. "You can't do that!" he said. "That's blackface!"

Turns out he, and several others at the table, think that me, as a white guy, painting my face Scooby-Doo brown, would be blackface. To me I hadn't even considered that there would be any racial connotations whatsoever - it's a dog, not a person of another race - and that I shouldn't do it. Not sure whether it matters, but everyone saying it would be wrong was white, the one black guy at the table had no problem with it at all.

To me, this seems like an incredibly unhelpful level of insensitivity which is only aimed at getting outraged wherever possible, not at actual injustice.

So, if I go ahead with dressing as Scoob for Halloween, face painted brown (AS A DOG) - WIBTA?

#60 Aita For Losing My Temper With My Neighbor And Her Kids On Halloween

One of my neighbors who lives on my street is a literal nightmare. She is with our homeowners association and seems to have a personal grudge against me and a few other neighbors. Once my aunt came to visit, and she parked right in front of my house. We live in a quiet suburban neighborhood, so her car wasn't blocking the road at all and it is never busy, but my neighbor took it upon herself to report it and I got faced with a hefty fine.

She will always do other petty things, like if my wife and my kids walk our dog, sometimes our neighbor will follow them behind to make sure they clean up after it, don't walk on anyone's grass, it's ridiculous.

Those are just a couple of examples, on to the story. Now no one really respects my neighbor and I vowed if she comes to the door I will straight up refuse to answer. Sure enough, she and her kids come up to my door. I am looking from the window and the kids knock a few times and look like they are going to give up, the mother comes up and knocks on my door (She sees our cars in the drive way so she knows we're home). I relent and answer and she badgers me "how come you didn't answer, we've been here for 5 minutes"

Her kids interrupt her and cheerily say "trick or treat," I wanted to give them candy because they are fairly well behaved, but because their mother is a nightmare, I say "sorry, not giving you guys anything."

The mother flips and yells at me for not being in the spirit of Halloween and mentions how she will embarrass me by telling everyone about how much of a "scrooge" I am. They leave and I sit there FUMING.

After a couple minutes I grab a few candy bars, walk outside and find them a few houses down. I storm up to them, throw the candy at their feet and yell at the mother "here's the candy for your kids, enjoy it you old hag." She looked terrified because I did approach them suddenly.

I am not sure if I was the jerk here or not, my neighbor has been nothing but rude to me for years and because I initially refused to give her kids candy, I was somehow the bad guy?

#61 Aita For Not Serving Alcohol At My Halloween Party?

I (27F) don't drink alcohol. It's a personal decision, I don't mind if other people drink around me, as long as they respect my desire not to and don't get pushy.

I regularly host parties and small gatherings with friends, and I usually serve a variety of food and non alcoholic beverages, usually beverages that I would drink if there were any left over), and I'm fine with people bringing their own alcohol if they want to drink, and it's never been an issue before, most of my friends know I don't drink, and my parties are usually a success either way.

This year I hosted a Halloween party, and I invited friends, and a couple coworkers that were cool but I wasn't super close friends with yet, and a few friends brought over their friends as well.As usual, I didn't serve alcohol. Things were going fine, and then my coworkers showed up, a few of them clearly already slightly buzzed.

My best friend Kev, who knows I don't drink, and had sometimes brought his own alcohol to my place in the past, starts chatting with my coworkers, and then after while, loudly starts talking about wanting a drink, and offers to go to the convenience store down the block to buy some alcohol. People were excited about this, so Kev left, got some booze, and came back.

After the party before he left, Kev pulled me aside, and gave me a lecture. He told me that he respected my decision not to drink, but that if I was throwing a party for anyone outside of my close friends, alcohol was an expectation, and that I was going to disappoint a lot of people, or be seen as misleading if there wasn't alcohol. He insisted that next time, I should at least warn people that I wasn't serving alcohol, in case that was a dealbreaker or they wanted to bring their own, but that really, I should just suck it up and serve alcohol at my parties in the future.

He also insisted that he'd 'saved' my party by going out and buying booze, and asked if I would chip in for the cost of the alcohol he'd bought.

I was shocked, and refused, but today Kev sent me a venmo request for it anyway, and reminded me that I owed him for it (his venmo request was for $75)

I was shocked and hadn't realized it was such a big deal. AITA for not serving alcohol and for not warning people about this in advance?

#62 Aita For Asking My Girlfriend Not To Wear A Halloween Costume?

My girlfriend and I are both 21 years old. I don't know why, but she's already started planning Halloween parties and costumes with her friends. She wants to go to a few parties and clubs that night, and she wants us to go together. She wants to wear a hot Princess Jasmine costume. Jasmine already wears pretty revealing clothes in the animated movie, but my girlfriend just wants to wear a blue bra and a loose pair of pants that is very transparent and see through (not western style pants, more middle eastern style, but not exactly).

I am a very big fan of Aladdin and I played Aladdin in a school play, so I was actually very happy with her initial idea of a Jasmine costume, and was touched thinking she was doing it for me. I am not very comfortable with such a revealing "hot" costume though. AITA for asking her not to wear this costume? She was pretty upset with me, and is set on wearing this outfit, whether I agree with it or not. I understand that I have no right to control what she wears, and that it's her body and her choice. But seeing how uncomfortable I am with my girlfriend wearing such revealing clothes, I don't see any other alternative, but to ask her not to wear it, or not go with her on Halloween.

Even then, if I don't go with her, I'm not sure if I'm okay with her going to many parties and bars on her own dressed like that, when she has a boyfriend. I know how crazy such college, especially with massive amounts of drinking on Halloween. A lot of her female friends are also planning on wearing revealing "hot" outfits, and I guess it's par for the course for Halloween. I genuinely do not want to come across as a controlling prudish jerk, and I'm not forcing her to do anything, but I don't like how the whole thing has gone down.

#63 Aita For Scaring A Worker At A Halloween Haunted House?

My girlfriend loves being scared. It's her thing. I'm not going to be all macho and pretend nothing scares me. Heights give me the heebie geebies. So we went to a haunted house event. Not that crazy one where they actually torture you and you have to sign a forty page waiver, but it was still pretty extreme. I think we have all seen the pictures of groups of people recoiling in fear.

I however do not startle easy. And I have a difficult time suspending disbelief. So the guy chasing us through the haunted house with a chainsaw wasn't scary. To me. My girlfriend was scared from the disorientation and the noise and the best really amazing costume. But I played along. I let the actors chase us, I hid with her in a closet where the back falls away and there is a Japanese ghost girl in it. It was fun and my girlfriend was happy. When we got to the last room. The one where they take the picture of your group being scared, I didn't react to the thing that scares everyone else. I won't spoil it but I can understand why it would scare people.

So we got out and we went to see the pictures and there we are a group of six people with five cowering in fear and me looking slightly interested at the way they pulled off the effect.

I told my girlfriend I was so scared I froze.

So anyway we go have a few drinks and some food at a pub down the way. And on the way back to the car I saw one of the guys from the haunted house vaping in the alley. So I walked up quietly behind him and whispered "come here honey" in a deep gravelly voice. I am 6'2" and about 275. And I look a little bit like someone you would not want to share a prison cell with.

I was just joking but he jumped and knocked over some bottles that were on a ledge by him. I apologized for my silly prank. But he looked pissed and the other actors got that I was joking and laughed. I didn't touch him or anything. That would have been rude.

My girlfriend said I was a jerk for scaring him on his break. I feel kind of bad about it but you would think a guy who does that for work would have a better sense of humor about being scared.

#64 Aita For Not Wanting My Wife To Go Trick-Or-Treating?

My wife (24F), who is pregnant with our first child, asked me if we had plans for Halloween earlier today. It falls on a Monday, and I have to work the next day, so I told her that I didn’t have anything planned, aside from handing out candy to any trick-or-treaters who decide to come by. My wife said that her friend (also 24F) wanted to go trick-or-treating, and that she invited my wife to come along. Neither my wife or her friend have children yet (aside from wife currently being pregnant), so it would just be the two of them going around asking for candy. I told my wife that I think it’s a little inappropriate for an adult woman to go trick-or-treating unless they were accompanying children or something. My wife’s response was that she “looks like a teenager, and could pull it off.” Now I think this is rather silly, but it’s not necessarily a hill I’m willing to die on.

However, the key issue for me is this: My wife’s friend lives in a town 2 hours away, and my wife’s friend lives in a rural area without good cell phone reception. So the situation is no longer just my wife wanting to go trick or treating with her friend, but that they want to go trick or treating 2 hours away in an area with little to no cell phone reception. I feel that I worry a lot about my wife and her well-being already since she’s pregnant, and I don’t want the added stress of her being out trick or treating in a rural area 2 hours away. I basically told her I’m not okay with her going out with her friend in this situation, and she’s quite upset at me as a result

64 Halloween Conflicts That Prove Costumes Aren’t The Only Things That Can Be Scary